The cyclops golden boy
by Two-twisted-girls
Summary: When Steve found out he was in fact owned by SHIELD he was not happy and didn't really feel like being the perfect all american boy of gold anymore. So Tony decide to help Steve ruin his image. Steve x Tony
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1: Rolling heads and relaxing herbs **

"I am not an assassin!"

The shield sliced through the air with a scary precision. It reached the necks of at least seven unsuspecting terrorists decapitating them with a hissing sound.

"You are exactly what I'm telling you to be, son."

The blood was flowing and painted the floor and the walls and even some of the ceiling red. Every one of the bearded men that still had a head stopped what they were doing and turned their gaze towards the entrance of the cave and the terrifying silhouette of a tall, muscular man with furios blue eyes.

"I am not going!"

"This is a direct order!"

"I don't care what it is! I refuse!" The intimidating man with the eye patch sighed.

"You can't." The blonde shrugged.

"I am not doing it. Just fire me... No wait I quit."

"You can't," the director repeated.

"Don't be silly. Of Course I can!"

"I am sorry Captain, but you really can't. That serum in your body... when that entered you you became SHIELD property." The blue eyes widened in shock.

"WHAT?"

"Now you can make it easier on yourself by following my orders or things can get real nasty."

"You can't just own me! I am not a tank, or a gun, or a chair!" He tried his hardest to keep voice from trembling but it was hard.

"I am not your slave! That was not even legal in my age!" The one eyed looked at him with a death serious expression.

"Rogers... We are SHIELD. We are above laws."

Steve hated the screams, the blood and most of all being feared. He catched the shield as it flew back to him now slippery with blood. He threw it again before any of the poor men even realized what was going on. God he hated killing! Of course it was not the first time. He had pegged tons of nazis under the war but he still couldn't stand it. And the one thing about this mission was it was all about killing these guys off. - come on Steve! You can do this... for America remember! - he tried to tell himself but this time the thought only brought a sour taste to his mouth. - Who am I kidding. I am Furys bitch! - He catched his baby once again and snarled at the bright red, white and blue colors. - This would never had happened in Canada. Why couldn't I just be Captain Canada instead? That would have been so much easier! - The terrorist was starting to fight back and some bullets rebounded from the shield. Steve sighed. He tried to picture every terrorist alive with Furys face and threw that one particular strong hand grenade into the cave and walked away without looking back at the explosion. Because maybe he was a slave. Maybe he was a 90 year old virgin, and even though he right now wished his shield to be red and white with a maple leaf instead of a star in the middle, he was still Captain America. A badass.

He didn't talk when he arrived back at the base. Not a word was spilled when he was on the flight home. He especially did not say anything when he was debriefed back at SHIELD's headquarters. Fury had patted him on the shoulder like he was some dog telling him something like he was a good boy. Steve had really restrained himself from not giving in and planting a fist in the directors mouth.

Tony Stark was bored. He had everything. Money, a hot girlfriend and a flying iron suit. Why was he not satisfied? He was saving the world a couple of times a month. He had awesome friends and an awesome job. So why was his life so dull?

He was for once sitting alone in the living room of his tower drinking a nice cup of strong coffee, watching a stupid soap while it was thundering outside. He hadn't been much alone since all his fellow avengers had moved in. There was always some kind of loud demi god yelling about whale saving (Yes, Thor had become a Greenpeace activist). Well it was nice when he did that because then he would drown the really loud assassin sex next door. His lab was shared with Bruce. Which was fine. That guy was awesome. And then there was Steve. Tony smiled for himself. At first him and the old-young soldier-boy didn't get along at all but eventually they had grown on each other. They were still not the best of friends, but on the battlefield they made a hell of a team. It was fun how the spangly suit changed the man. Without it the guy was almost cute (as cute as a giant, cut super soldier could be), and then he was completely clueless about everything. That plus his pretty unspoiled innocence made him the teams everlasting victim of evil pranks (like making him google Lemon Party).

But now no one was at home. Thor was saving whales, Bruce was on some science convention. The assassins and Steve was doing something secret SHIELD-work. Even Pepper didn't have time for him. This was in fact more boring than usual.

A lightning lightened up the living room as the door was almost kicked open and a furious man still covered in blood and dirt entered. Tony screamed like a little girl spilling his coffee all over the place. Then he uttered some colorful swear words because of the burning coffee on his pants.

"Shit Cap! You scared me!" Steve muttered something indistinctly and threw his shield at the floor without even noticing Tony.

"Hey! Wow... hey... What's going on there?" Tony jumped to his feet hurrying towards the angry blonde. Steve shook his head and then finally noticed Tony.

"I hate him! He doesn't own me!" he roared. And then to Tony's big surprise tears started to well up in the blue eyes.

"Wow wow wow! Stop! What's going on?" Tony repeated with fear in his voice. There was nothing more scary than big, crying men.

"Tony..." the cap croaked.

"I just found out I am Furys slave!" He then started to sob violently.

"But we all are! Haven't that sunk in yet?"

"No! I mean for real! I tried to quit today and he wouldn't let me! He made me do terrible things!" Tony's eyes widened in shock. He grabbed Steve's sleeve and dragged him over and down into the sofa. He looked at him with worried eyes.

"Son... did he touch you inappropriate places?" Steve frowned and stood up again.

"If you are not going to take this seriously I am leaving," he muttered but Tony dragged him down.

"Okay sorry! I will behave. What happened?" Steve uttered a small, whiny sound before he started talking really fast.

"He wanted me to be a one man army, which is okay because I kinda am, but then he said I should kill this minor terror cell off. Nothing else. And I am not an assassin! I avoid killing people unless my life is in danger! I told him I wouldn't and I would rather quit, but then he told me I gave up my freedom because of the serum, and I now belonged to SHIELD, and if I didn't behave they would lock me in a lab the rest of my days!" Tony lifted an eyebrow.

"That's not legal," he mumbled.

"I know! But they don't care and I have to be useful for them one way or another! And I can't do anything because SHIELD is almighty!" He tried to wipe away his tears in an angry motion but they just kept rolling out of his eyes. He didn't really like the thought of weeping in front of Stark. And it didn't help that Tony looked like he was feeling really awkward.

"So what are you going to do about it?" Tony finally asked.

"I can't do anything!" Steve spat. Tony nodded.

"You need a drink."

"Obviously but I can't get drunk."

"Right... then you need something else."

"Like what?" Tony rose from the couch.

"I'll be right back," he said and marched away. He returned a couple of minutes later with a big bag of some not all innocent herbs. Steve lifted an eyebrow. Normally he would have made a very long Captain speech about how he needed his team to be clear in their heads all the time because else it would be difficult to save the world and so on, but right now he was so upset that he didn't care.

"This is Bruce's stash of weed... and he will probably hulk out when he find out... but I have the feeling you need it more than him."

"But will it work on me?" Steve asked softly. Tony smirked.

"Yes... yes it will."

"You know what's funny, Tony?" Steve asked and puffed on their fourth joint. Tony slowly shook his head looking at him with a dazed expression. They were on the floor now, laying on their backs.

"I am supposed to fight for freedom and now I am not even free myself. How does that even make sense?" Tony took the joint out of his hand.

"You know it doesn't! Fury is an ass pirate!" He fought himself up on his elbow and turned to lay on his side facing the soldier.

"You should totally just make things really difficult for him!"

"How?"

"Just do a lot of stupid things in public."

"Like you?" Steve asked with a little smirk on his face.

"Exactly," Tony answered with a stoneface.

"But then you have to stop being such a girl scout, if it have to work out."

"I'm not a girl scout," Steve pouted which made Tony crack up. He laughed for a good moment.

"That was a good one!" He ruffled Steves hair and passed him the joint.

"You know... I can help you out. I am the master of making Fury pissed anyways . You just have to do exactly what I tell you!"

"It sounds a little dangerous," Stave said with a little smile.

"Oh trust me it is! But Fury will be... well furious. He would hate seeing his little Goldilocks be corrupted." Steve didn't answer right away. He exhaled a cloud of smoke. Maybe it was time for some changes in his life. He looked at Tony with slightly frowned brows.

"Okay. Then corrupt me."

Tony smirked. Maybe the Captain could save him from his boredom.

**I hope I didn't spell too much like a Wiking... **

**Ps. Yes... Thor's Greenpeace activism is in fact canon c: Everyone should just go and watch Ultimate Avengers it's just lovely! **

**But anyways! Hope you enjoyed the story so far. Next chapter is done and will be up soon.**

**Landevejsridder **


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: Looks like an angel and moves like a devil**

****  
"I MAKE THEM GOOD GIRLS GO BAAAD! I MAKE THEM GOOD GIRLS GO BAAAAAAAD! GOOD GIRLS GO BAAAAA-AAAA-AAAD..."

Tony's voice was resounding in all of the tower. It was not uncommon. In fact he was always singing in the shower. Every morning/noon. Very loud and not very pretty. But it made the whole team smile. It was like his choice of songs always told something about what was going on in his life, and the subject was often discussed at the morning table.  
"So what is this one about?" Natasha asked while sipping her coal black coffee. Steve smiled a little. He knew a little too well what this one was about.

"Maybe he have finally made Pepper do that thing, you know?" Clint smirked while nudging the russian with his elbow.

"Shut up Clint. Pep and I have talked about that, and it is not gonna happen!"

The agents had returned later last night. They luckily hadn't noticed the thick smell of marijuana that was perfuming the living room and had went directly to their bedroom to engage in ungodly activities. Very loud. If Steve hadn't been so stoned he would probably have hid in his closet, covering his ears humming children songs, while rocking back and forth.

"Hey cap? Why are you smiling? You know what this song is about, don't you?" Natasha asked with a lifted eyebrow. Steve's smile widened.

"Not at all," he lied and took a bite of an red apple.

"And you are a terrible liar," Clint said slightly annoyed. Steve was about to defend himself as Bruce stomped out in the kitchen.

"Hey Bruce. When did you return home?"

"Okay who smoked my weed?" Steve lowered his head so no one would notice his pillarbox red facial color. Clint lifted his hands.

"We didn't! We have not been home all weekend!" Bruce growled.

"I knew it... It can only be Thor! All those hippie rallies are not good for him! Just wait to I get my hands on him. I will smash him with his own hammer!" He took a large calming breath and dropped down on the chair next to Clint and poured some coffee for himself.

"Hey cap? Why are you... so red?" Clint asked.

"Yeah and where are your 'marijuana makes you slow and I can't use slow soldiers'-speech?" Natasha added. Steve's face was on fire, and he wondered if this was how Red Skull must have felt.

"Steve?" Bruce asked softly.

"You haven't smoked my weed, right?" Steve's lip trembled.

"Okay! Yes! I did it!" He exclaimed while slamming his hands against the table.

"But I was really upset and then Tony said I needed a drink, but I can't get drunk and then he said I still could get high and then we smoked it all. Oh this is so embarrassing! You must think I am a terrible leader!" It was silent like a graveyard around the table for some time.

"So this is what the song is about?" Clint finally said.

"You are the good girl who was going bad?" Natasha giggled. And then all three of them broke down laughing. Tears was flowing out of Natasha's eyes, Clint was rolling around on the floor and Bruce was slamming his head against the table.

"S-so you don't hate me?" Steve asked with a small voice. Even louder laughter.

"Oh you little..." Bruce was sobbing without almost no voice.

"So what's going on?" Tony asked as he entered the room. Steve just looked helplessly at him.

"They found out," he almost whispered. Tony chuckled.

"You wouldn't do well under torture."

"Oh like you would?"

"I did." He ruffled Steve's hair as he walked by and sat down next to him.

"You better brace yourself. We have a long night in front of us," he whispered. He then slipped something into Steve's hand under the table.

"What is that?"

"It's a little something to slow down your metabolism."

"What?"

"So you can get drunk. You are not gonna fuck shit up sober you know."

"But Tony I..."

"Just take the pill sweet cheeks." Steve sighed. He put the pill in his mouth and washed it down with some coffee.

"Good boy. Now meet me in the garage at midnight. Don't let anyone see you."

Steve had almost forgot how it felt. The burning sensation in his throat. The fuzzy feeling in his head. The way the world was spinning around slightly.  
"Tony... I-I think your pill is working," he muttered. Tony let out a short laugh.

"Well of course it does! I am not an ammatuer!" Steve giggled. He then covered his mouth with a terrified expression. Did he just giggle?

"That wasn't very manly," he muttered. He took one calming breath wavering his hand to shut up Tony's hysterical laughing.

"Shut up! I used to be a little guy, remember!"

"Sure thing. What I was going to say was that with that amount of booze you have been drinking I think you would have been wasted pill or not!"

They had arrived at a suspect club in the more industrial part of town. Steve had experienced a slight culture shock. The music was deafening, the lights was blinding and everyone was pretty far out on drugs. At first he had been tempted to run back home and hide behind his lovely, patriotic shield, but then a guy in a long, leather coat had walked by, and he once again was reminded just why he was there. And with sizzling anger burning under his skin he had drowned an almost ridiculous amount of alcohol with Tony.

Tony was at the moment frowning and stared rather intensely on his wrist.

"Tony?"

"Mmhh?"

"What's wrong?" Steve asked with a small voice. Tony shook his head and looked back at his face with an almost confused expression.

"Do you dance freedom boy?"

"No... no no! I never learned it!" Tony's face cracked into a devilish smirk. He grabbed his arm and started dragging him towards the dancefloor.

"Tony! What are you doing!" Steve whined.

"It's about time you learned something new!" Tony grinned. He stopped and looked pending at him

"Dance!" he demanded.

"B-but... how?"

"It's easy nowadays! Just make slutty movements in the rhythm of the music!" Steve was glowing red. Tony sighed and started walking around him in a small circle.

"Tony... I can't." Tony sighed again and stopped right behind him. He leaned in and started whispering into his ear:  
"If you do not dance you have no purpose. And we don't keep things here that have no purpose. You see, your fight for survival starts right now. You don't want to be judged? You won't be. You don't think you're strong enough? You are. You're afraid. Don't be. You have all the weapons you need. Now fight." Steve closed his eyes and took a deep breath. And then he let go.

"He looks like an angel and moves like a devil. Who is that?" Tony sipped his drink and snickered to the man who was standing beside him at the bar. Tony chuckled in his head. this place was so ridiculously suspect so why hadn't he predicted that they would meet him there?

"That...? That is Captain America. I thought you could recognize your own college, Logan?" The slightly hairy mutant growled at him.

"We are still not colleges, Stark. And what are he doing here? And why is he so wasted?" Tony shrugged.

"That is an excellent question Scratchy. I think it is because he simply have drunk too much!"

"You're a dick."

"Dick and proud."

Tony sighed. The Captain was indeed a hell of a dancer. It was weird. He was so big and then again he moved with such grace.  
"I blame it on the serum," he muttered to himself. He frowned. Why was his hips so loose. It was not manly at all. And why was his ass better than any woman's he had seen tonight.

"Is it sparkling?" he whispered to himself. He was almost starting to feel bad about eye-raping the american saint, but then again, everybody in the club was probably doing the same. At the same time Steve suddenly face planted the ground and Tony took that as sign on that the 80000 tequila shots they had downed probably had caught up to him and it probably was way over the bedtime for small soldiers.

"Do you want me to hold your hair?"

"Tony... I feel like I am dying!" Steve once again buried his face in the toilet with a pained groan and emptied his stomach for the third time. Tony chuckled and rubbed his back soothingly.

"Don't worry big guy. You get used to the feeling! By the way you are an amazing dancer. I can't believe you have never done it before!" Steve lifted his face from the bowl and smiled weakly.

"So I was doing good?"

"Hell yeah! Even Wolverine noticed!" Steve laughed a bit but then he got sick again. He eventually passed out with his face in the bowl and Tony had to wake up Thor ( who luckily had returned same evening) to carry him back to bed. It had been a good night.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: Saved by the cockblock**

****  
"SHE'S A MANIAC MANIAC ON THE DANCEFLOOR AND SHE'S DANCING LIKE SHE NEVER DANCED BEFORE!"

Steve groaned face down the morning table. He was never going to drink again. And what was up with his hangover anyways? He was supposed to heal fast! That serum sucked! And why wasn't Tony dying too? He was apparently in a really good mood and sang extra loud that morning.  
"So I assume you are the she again?" Nat asked while sipping her almost undrinkable, strong coffee.

"Yup. I think I might be a pretty decent dancer. Or so Tony says. But I can't really remember that much..."

"So what happened last night?" Steve was about to answer but flinched when he was cut off by Thors booming voice.

"I carried Rogers to bed like he was my bride in the early morning hours! He and the man of iron had been consuming beverage as it was the last day on earth!" Natasha and Clint snickered to each other.

"So like a bride, eh? I thought booze didn't work on you, Cap?" Clint giggled. Steve groaned again and rested his head on his hands.

"It doesn't! But then Tony drugged me with something, and then it worked pretty well!"

"I can't believe what's gotten into you lately!" Bruce laughed.

"First my weed and then clubbing? What's next, Blackjack and hookers? Where has the good ol' captain gone?" Steve smiled a weak smile.

"You know I am actually still mentally a 23 year old so it is to be expected of me. Isn't that what young people do in this age?" Bruce nodded and patted him on the back.

"You are right again. But what I don't understand is why so suddenly?" Steve sighed.

"Trust me... I have my reasons."

Steve was standing outside Tony's workshop, hesitant to knock on the door. He usually didn't go there unless he had a really good reason but right now he just felt like it. He took a deep breath and lifted his hand to knock at the door but it slipped open before he even managed to touch it.

Even though he had seen it a couple of times before he always dropped his jaw when the door opened and revealed the workshop. It was almost like a ghost world where things moved by them self, holographic blueprints was flowing in open air and Stark himself stood face buried in some kind of weird tech, covered in oil and with his hair standing out in every direction looking like a mad scientist.  
"So are you just going to stand there all day?" Steve jumped a bit and hurried inside. Tony looked up from whatever he was doing with a pending expression. Steve was suddenly at a massive loss of words. The silence just got more and more uncomfortable. Steve started to fidget.

Tony hadn't expected to be bothered. Maybe by Bruce, but that guy was never really a bother. But as Steve walked into the workshop with eyes at the size of teacups he couldn't help but think that he actually didn't mind being disturbed. Not by Steve anyways. Steve was looking like he was feeling really awkward which he surprisingly enough found almost... cute? He couldn't help but chuckle.

"What do you want?" he asked with amusement in his voice.

"I don't know," Steve whispered.

"Just talk I guess?"

"I thought you did that with the other big, blonde guy?" Steve nodded. He was right. He was usually hanging out with Thor. They had a lot in common. He was from outer time and Thor from outer space. Almost the same thing.

"I can go if you..."

"No. Stay. Make yourself at home!" Tony cut in with a smile. And then he stayed.

He stayed for hours. Tony was first smugly showing off what he was making and Steve was mesmerized. And then they started talking about everything. At first it was the missions, then the team and then their lives.

"So how about the girls?" Tony finally asked. Steve shrugged.

"There was one. But she is really old now. I don't even know if she's alive anymore. But we didn't even make it on a date."

"So you guys never...?" Steve blushed and shook his head.

"Mother of...! So it is true?" Tony muttered. He was shitting bricks.

"I can't believe it! But then again you always act like you a virgin fucking Mary. But still... A handsome guy like you." Steve sighed.

"It's not like I never had the opportunity. It's just..."

"Sure thing. You are saving yourself for marriage or something. Jesus Cap!" Tony opened a small cabinet and took out a bottle of pills. He then walked over and pinched Steve's nose and shoved a pill down his throat when he gasped for air.

"What the hell, Tony?!"

"Did I tell you we were getting wasted tonight? And then I will hook you up with a bunch of hot babes!" Steve frowned.

"But Tonyyyyyyy..."

"Save it wonderboy! You are coming!"

Bruce frowned as he stared into the kitchen from the living room. Steve was dancing around humming loudly dressed in a frilly apron and making dinner for the team. The food part was not that uncommon. He had started doing it almost instantly after he had moved into the tower. He apparently had little housewife inside him which was fine because he actually was a great cook.

"Thor?"

"What is on your mind my friend?"

"Have you noticed anything weird with Steve?" The demigod leaned over to take a peek inside the kitchen.

"I believe I only have seen him dance with the punching bags at the gymnasium. Is it worrying you my dear friend?" Bruce frowned even harder.

"I don't know to be honest. But look at him for gods sake! Why is his hips so loose?"

"He is indeed moving them like a woman or Loki would."

"I can't stop staring at his ass..."

"Me neither. That backside is indeed a piece of art that would bring any woman to shame."

"As you can say it, Thor." Both men suddenly flinched. Steve had suddenly very violently started to stab an eggplant repeatedly like it was his archenemy.

"What the fuck, Steve? Have that eggplant insulted you or something?" Clint exclaimed as he walked by. His hair was a mess and it was obvious what him and Nat had been up to until now. Steve snapped out of his suspect eggplant-rage and looked up with a confused expression.

"I'm sorry," the big blonde answered softly.

"It just reminded me of someone." Bruce looked at Thor with big eyes.

"I swear something is wrong here!" he whispered loudly.

"And I will find out what it is! Are you in this with me?"

"Always my friend. Always."

"What even is this shit? Why is there no meat?" Tony whined pointing almost accusing at the unbearable healthy vegetable stew. Steve smiled brightly.

"You better eat it. It is really good for you with a lot of vitamins."

"You're not my mom!"

"No but I'm your Captain and thats even worse. Now eat up soldier or I'm gonna force it down your throat."

"Ohh... I love it when you get all dominant... It really turns me on."

"Tony. Just eat your food." Steve was blushing furiously.

"Sir yes sir!"

Steve dropped down on the chair beside Tony. Tony grinned at him.  
"Midnight at the garage. If you're not there I will come get you." He whispered and added with a smirk:  
"And wear something sexy..." Steve blushed a bit and scowled at Tony. Bruce lifted an eyebrow.

"What are you guys whispering about?" Steve blushed even more.

"Nothing!" he exclaimed. Tony laughed and patted Steve on the knee.

"I'm taking him out again tonight and I told him to wear something pretty. Tonight I will make him a man!" Steve now had a facial color that probably could light up a darkroom.

"Tonyyyy..." he croaked pathetically.

"Theres nothing to be ashamed of! I am the worlds greatest wingman!"

"But I don't even know if I..."

"Of course you will Capsicle!" Tony cut in. Bruce shot Thor a knowing look. Tony deffintly knew what was going on, and he was a part of it.

Steve ended up finding himself back at the suspect club. This time dressed in tight, black clothing which sadly made him look a bit like a streetwalker he thought. But Tony had convinced him that he looked smoking...

They had drank, fought and made their ancestors proud, as Thor would had expressed it and Steve was again completely wasted and rocking out on the dancefloor. Tony had joined him for once, but had then disappeared. But then Steve saw him waving at him at a table. He was sitting with three other busty dames. Steve sighed. He didn't really know why his virginity was so important for Tony. But then again there was so much about this new age that he didn't understand. Tony waved him impatient towards the bar and Steve just went along with it. - Everything to make Tony happy, - he thought to himself.

"Steeeeveee!" Tony sang.

"Meet Sara, Lara and Clara!" He pointed at the ladys. A blonde, a brunette and a redhead.

"Oh he's just adorable! I could just eat him!" the redhead smirked.

Tony left Steve with the girls under the excuse that he would get himself another drink. It had been difficult. His instinct had told him to run off with one or two of them himself. Man being in a relationship sucked sometimes! He reminded himself to make an appointment with Pepper soon. He really needed a fuck. Tony glared back at the girls. Something unexpected was stirring inside him. - They really look like they are going to eat him. Women can be terrifying. - he thought. Steve didn't really notice anything. He was smiling, and laughing, looking absolutely adorable as he tried to tell a story making big arm movements, which just made Tony more angry - he's worth ten of those bitches- he thought to himself. He slapped his own hand. Why was he thinking like that so suddenly? Tony found himself again staring mesmerized on Steve's wrists.

"Wow you are more green than the Hulk. Why are you so jealous?"

"Shut up Logan! I'm not jealous. It's me who have hooked him up with them." Wolverine smirked.

"Why would you do such a thing?"

"Idk. The kid needs some pussy." Logan broke down in hyperventilating laughter.

"Stark... Look at him! You don't need to be psychic to see that the kid is so gay that he probably fart rainbows!" Tony nearly choked on his scotch.

"Logan! Your a genius! That is what is wrong with his wrists! They are too loose!" Tony nearly yelled scaring a bartender or two.

"That is why his is so damn tuff with the shield," Logan added with a smug grin. Tony's eyes suddenly widened.

"What do I do? He probably doesn't even know what gay is. And those vixens are going to eat him alive! Oh god what have I done?" Logan laughed and patted him on the shoulder.

"Save him."

"You're right! I'm fucking Iron Man it's my freaking job!"

"Go get him tiger!"

"Right!... FUCK! HE'S GONE!"

Steve was sitting on a couch. The redheaded dame was awfully close. One fishnet dressed leg over his lab and a long nailed hand on his arm. He couldn't help but shudder. He didn't feel all that comfortable. He had to swallow down a little whimper (of terror) as she shifted and sat on his lap.

"Oh Captain. You are so hot!" she almost growled and leaned towards his face while hungrily licked her lips.

"Hey dude! What's up! Long time no see!" a familiar voice almost yelled. The redhead was swiped from his lap and Steve couldn't help but feel saved by the bell.

"So it's late and the coach is already turning back into a pumpkin! We have to go!" Tony panted as he grabbed Steve's hand and started dragging him out of the club.

"So it was nice meeting you, Clara. I call you!" Steve called back pathetically. He was only being polite. That was one of the most terrifying things he had ever experienced.

"You're welcome!" Tony stated as they sat back in the car. Steve laughed.

"What was that? Hey dude, long time no see? We have been seeing each other all day?"

"You were cockblocked!" It came from the drivers seat.

"Shut up Happy!" Tony growled.

"I was saving him!" Steve sighed and shook his head.

"But Tony. It was you who introduced me to them?"

"Yeah then I realised something. And I changed my mind."

"B-but..."

"Give me your arm."

"Why?"

"Just do it." Steve sighed and offered Tony his arm. Tony took it and started shaking it.

"What are you...?"

"Look how loose your wrists are." Steve looked at him with worry in his eyes.

"Tony? You haven't eaten any of those funny pills that looks like candy, have you?"

"Just shut up. We talk about it when we are home."

Tony dragged Steve down on the couch the moment they entered the penthouse. He looked at Steve with giant eyes. Steve just answered his glance with the worried expression.

"Tony... I think you should go to b..."

"YOU'RE GAY!" Tone yelled out before he could stop himself. Steve looked like he had a bucket of ice water thrown at his face.

"No i'm not!" he answered looking terrified.

"That is not right! And what about Peggy and...!" He didn't finish his rant and ended up just uttering a whiny sound and running to his room. Tony sighed.

"That could have been done more graceful... Poor kid." He rose to his feet started walking to Steve's room.

He knocked gently at the door. No answer. He tried to open but the door was locked.  
"JARVIS unlock!"

"Sir I don't think Captain Rogers wishes company at the moment."

"I don't care. He doesn't know what's good for him! Now open!"

"As you wish sir," the AI answered coldly and the door clicked open. Tony tiptoed inside.

Steve was laying on his bed face down the pillow. Off course he was gay. He had known that since his early teens but that didn't mean it was all right. He had seen men been beaten half to death for that back in the 40's. He was fine with it being a secret. How had Tony found out. Was he really that obvious? He groaned into the pillow. He felt the weight of someone sitting down on his bed. A hand rubbing him soothingly on the back.  
"Go away Tony," he whined halfhearted.

"Steve... I think we need to talk. It really isn't that big of a deal in this time you know?"

"I'm still not gay... Oh who am I kidding? I am so gay..." A sob escaped down the pillow.

"And theres nothing wrong with that! Gays can even get married now!"

"But Tony. I am Captain America. I can't be. I have to get married to a busty blonde and have kids and a dog and all those things. This SUCKS!" Tony pattet his back.

"No. You would suck as straight! You are only that good with your shield because of your loose wrists. And by the way I thought we were ruining your image? This is great for that. Man... Fury will be pissed when he finds out... and those guys from the bible belt too. This is...fabulous!" Steve couldn't help but laugh at that. He actually felt a little better. Tony smiled.

"Come on champ. I'll make you a nice cup of herbal tea."

**So thanks to all the people who have read the story and subscribed and reviewed and stuff! **


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: Did you know Steve was gay?**

****

"KEEEEEEEEEEEEEP HOLDING OOOOOOOOOOOON! CUZ YOU KNOW WE MAKE IT THROUGH WE MAKE IT THROUGH! JUUUUUUUUUUUUUUST STAAAAAAY STROOOOOONG! CUZ YOU KNOW I'M THERE FOR YOU THERE FOR YOU!"

Steve sighed. He had been expecting something like that. Last night they had went to the kitchen and made herbal tea. They had talked for hours and really got into the heart of the case. Steve had told him about the homophobic 40's and they had hugged and he had also cried a bit. (Only because of the alcohol! And it had been manly tears!) And off course Tony was now singing about it... loudly.

"Soooo... Steve?" Clint asked.

"What is this one about?" Steve sighed. He should get it over with and just jump all the way out off the closet already. Tony had convinced him that it wasn't that big of a deal and the rest of the team deserved to know and that he by the way would feel much better not having to hide his true self. He looked around the morning table. Only Tony himself was missing and they all looked pending at him. It was a shame though. He could use some moral support.

"Last night Tony and I had a long talk about me accepting what I really am." Natasha took a long sip of her coffee.

"So you're finally out off the closet?" Steve nearly choked on his juice.

"How does everybody know that?!"

"I didn't. Natasha had to tell me," Clint added.

"But then again. Your frilly apron... And the way you look when women are hitting on you. And the way your head nearly explode every time Thor walks around naked," Bruce said and smiled fondly.

"But don't worry my brave friend!" Thor boomed.

"We would still follow you through the gates of Hell and back no matter whom thou share your bedsheets with!" Steve had to swallow down a sob. There were no way he was going all emotional in front of his team.

"Thank you guys!" he muttered.

"So you told them?" Tony asked without looking away from his tech.

"Apparently they all knew already," Steve answered softly. Tony groaned.

"So they didn't bother telling me and freaking Wolverine had to do it! Wow great friends I have." Steve chuckled.

"They didn't tell me either, remember?"

He was once again finding himself in the lab. This time he had brought his sketchbook and was laying on the floor drawing Tony without even realising it.

"So next time I will hook you up with a bunch of hot dudes!"

"Tony... I think it would be better if I just went out on a date as a start. I'm still new to this."

"No! Dates is for sissies! So what's your type?" Steve looked wondering up from his drawing. - Dark hair, doe eyes. Possibly genius, billionaire, playboy philanthropist ... Stop thinking like that Steve! - Steve scolded himself in his mind - But seriously that man has the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen! - some stupid, sappy part of his mind added.

"You have pretty eyes!" Steve covered his mouth. Terrified. Did he just say that out loud? Tony frowned like he wasn't sure what he just heard.

"Thanks I guess?"

"Oh gosh! I just didn't say that out loud?" Steve groaned and face planted on his sketch block. Tony just laughed.

"It's all right. It was just... unexpected. You too... Yours are pretty too..." There was a long, deafening awkward silence.

"...Tony... I..." Then the door slipped open and a strawberry blonde woman entered.

"Pepper... You're back?" Tony's voice was almost strained.

"Well I missed you too. Hey Steve! How nice to see you two not trying to kill each other for once!" Then she walked over to Tony and kissed him deeply. And Steve suddenly had the urge to throw the woman through a wall. Or maybe cry a few more of those manly tears he seemed to shed constantly at the time.

- Stupid Steve! You knew he was in a happy relationship with a woman for gods sake. Stop being sad! - This time it was the Captain America-voice that was yelling at him in his head but it still didn't make the clenching in his stomach go away. He sighed softly. It was so much easier that time they were constantly fighting. Or no that wasn't true. Even at that time Steve had been attracted to him. He had still thought Tony was a 'douche' as it was called in this new age, but a terribly handsome one. And it had frustrated him and he had been so mean. And then later he had found out that he wasn't a selfish bastard at all. Probably at that same time Tony disappeared with that nuke. At the same time he had also realised that he had these kinds of feelings that Tony would probably never return which sucked! But at that time when Tony laid lifeless on the ground in front of him, he had felt a little part of him die. He was lucky to even have him as a friend now. - And that should be enough too! - Steve thought furious at himself and his lack of control over his emotions. He felt a big hand on his shoulder.

"Something is saddening you, Stephen. I can feel it all the from the other parts of the house. Do you wish to speak. I will gladly listen." Steve turned around to face the slightly taller demigod and smiled a weak smile.

"It's nothing. It really is. It's just me being stupid. But thanks. It's very sweet of you."

"I believe a lot of great things have happened in your life lately. There's nothing wrong with feeling sad or scared."

"Really Thor. It's not a big deal. It is literally just me being... you know... stupid." Thor pattet his back.

"I will subdue the water hottening machine into making you a cup of tea then!" A moan that didn't belong to Natasha drowned the god s voice and Steve sighed again looking down at the floor.

"Would you like to go out and sit on the balcony with me instead?" he then asked with a small, almost see through voice (out there he wouldn't be able to hear the lovemaking). A sudden understanding flashed over the gods face but he didn't comment on it. He just nodded.

"Of course my friend. Of course."

Tony had been aching after a good fuck for days now, but for some reason it wasn't enough when he finally got to it. It was dull. As dull as he hadn't felt since mission-corrupting-Steve began. At least Pepper didn't seem to notice and to judge from the noises she made he was still amazing in bed.

"Wow Tony. That was amazing."

"Guess who's gay!" Pepper groaned.

"Way to ruin the mood. It better not be you." Tony took a sip whiskey directly from the bottle.

"No of course not! And I said guess!"

"Is it Steve?"

"How? How does everyone know that?"

"It is pretty obvious you know." Tony didn't even have time to answer before he was cut off by an alarm.

"Oh! We are getting assembled!" Tony stated. Not disappointed at all. Pepper sighed.

"Always ruining our 'alone time'. Hurry up and then come back to bed," she said with a sweet smile. Well not at all as sweet as Steves. - Stop thinking like that, Stark!... Oh crap! Steve's gayness better not be contagious! - Tony laughed with a slightly hollow voice.

"I can't promise anything." And then he ran out of the bedroom while trying to pull some pants on.

"Loki has apparently escaped... again! And he is apparently at the moment turning Central Park into a jungle of flesh eating flowers!" Nick Fury stated while glaring at Thor. Did the Asgardians even try? The whole team sighed synchronically. This was probably the fifth time Loki had escaped. Why did they even bother locking him away? Steve tugged his hood/mask over his face.

"Come on guys! The faster we smash him the faster we can go home." he muttered. He really wasn't in the mood for this.

The fight ended up being not that easy. The Hulk kinda ended up breaking everything, and Clint was at some point nearly raped by a scary tentacle plant, but eventually Loki was squirming (once again) under Mjölnir.

"I will break out and next time you will not be able to stop me you petty excuses for heroes!"

"Shut up Loki," Steve muttered while pinching the bridge of his nose. He had taken a good hit to the head and was now suffering from a major headache. Plus just the sight of Fury had only made his mood even worse.

"Yeah tell him cap!" Tony cheered.

"You too Tony..." Tony lifted his metalclad hands in surrender and returned his gaze to the demigod under the hammer.

"Next time you break out be sure to visit us before you... destroy everything. I still owe you that drink!"

"... Good job people. You are dismissed." Steve was just about to leave when Fury stopped him.

"Rogers. Can I have a word with you?" Steve sighed dramatically. A bit childish but that damn cyclops shouldn't think that he was forgiven.

"What now? Is there more terrorist to kill or is it communists this time?" Fury didn't answer right away. Instead he dropped a trashy magazine on the table. Steve frowned and picked it up but dropped it again when he recognized himself on the front page. With the three girls from the club. All looking like they were going to eat him. Fury didn't look that amused.

"You better be more careful when you are out in public. It would be a shame if your image got ruined," he said coldly.

"I save the world. That is what people should worry about. Not what I do in my freetime," Steve stated just as cold. - Ha! Who's a good, little boy scout now... bitch. -

"You are dismissed. Just be more careful next time. You are the face of the Avengers. You have to look sympathetic."

Tony was waiting just outside the door. He was about to open his mouth but Steve interrupted him by sticking the magazine in his hand. It took a moment for Tony to understand what he was reading but eventually he shook his head.

"Captain Pimpmarica? Wow that's pathetic. Couldn't they come up with something better?" Steve just laughed tiredly.

"I know. It is terrible."

"So how did he react?"

"He was not amused."

"Wow we can do better than that! He have to be nearly exploding! I am up for some serious mischief tonight... and you're coming!"

"Shouldn't you be with Pepper? I mean she has just returned home." Tony just laughed.

"Have you ever heard the phrase Bro's before Ho's?" Steve had actually learned something from this new age and had heard the phrase before but coming from Tony it was one of the nicest things he had heard all day.

"Okay! We are going to a gay bar! But I don't really know how the gay-scene work so we have to bring an old gay that can teach us!" Steve nodded looking just a little confused. Tony threw a plain black T-shirt at him. At least two sizes too small.

"Wear this! It will bring out your curves. They are all gonna die. Just die!" Steve shyly started unbuttoning his lumberjack-shirt. - Does he have to look at me while doing that? Wait. Is that a boner I'm feeling... Oh nice. Really penis? Really? This is why we can't have nice things! - Tony thought, swallowing a lump in his throat, but still eating Steve with his eyes. Luckily Steve didn't look like he noticed anything. He let the flannel fall to the ground exposing the amazing greek-god-chest. - So did that just happen in slow motion? No seriously... Little Tony what are you doing? Little Tony... Stahp! - The magic suddenly stopped as Steve pulled the t-shirt over his head again. He was blushing a little. He had in fact noticed Tony's starring.

"So who do we know that is gay?" Steve asked.

"I obviously don't have a gaydar, since I was the only one who didn't figure you out, so..." Tony stopped mid sentence and suddenly a devilish smirk spread over his face.

"Okay I know one. But this is gonna be... Well it would be completely insane... But then again I do owe him a drink and he would probably escape by himself sooner or later." Chok flashet over Steves face as he understood what Tony was saying.

"Oh no... no no no! You aren't seriously thinking Loki? Oh no!" Tonys face cracked in giant cat-smile.

"Oh YES! YES! It is perfect!"

"And if Fury finds out he will lock me in a lab. That is way over the line!"

"Then we won't get caught!"

"No Tony. I'm not doing it."

"Yes you will! And you will like it!"

"...Tony..."

"Come on now we go get him!"

Loki was laying on the floor in Thor's room with the hammer on his chest hating his life. They didn't even bother putting him in a cell anymore. Thor had yelled at him for hours and had now left the room in infuriating rage. He would probably be returned to Asgard soon enough. Suddenly the door slowly creaked open. Loki sighed. Maybe it was the birdman that finally had come to shoot an arrow in his eye as he once promised. But it wasn't Clint Barton that entered. It was a big man and a slightly smaller man that tiptoed inside.

"Tony... I really don't think that this is a good idea..." Captain America was whispering with a small voice. Loki lifted an eyebrow but didn't say anything. What were they up to?

"Don't question my GENIUS!"

"I'm not questioning it. I just think you're better at making robots than getting ideas."

"You say that I'm only good for making machines you little prick?!"

"No Tony... I..." Loki could see the man of irons teeth flashing in a toothy grin while he patted the soldier on the chest.

"Just shut your mouth Steve. You're so much prettier when you don't talk!"

"So... To what do I owe the pleasure boys?" Loki sighed dramatically.

"Oh Loki? You're awake!" the soldier squeaked with an all too cheerful voice.

"I haven't slept," Loki answered coldly.

"Good because we are taking you out drinking... and dancing... and being fabulous!"

"Tony!"

"Shut it! Mommy and Daddy are talking! Did you know Steve was gay?"

"Tony... I swear i will crush your face with my shield!" Loki sighed again but this time with a smile on his face.

"Of course I know! Just like I know you are. But you just don't know it yet, or are willing to accept the fact. It's quite a shame though. You two would make quite the couple..."

"Okay shut it Reindeer Games. I'm not!" Loki just laughed.

"So why do you want to free me?"

"You have to teach Steve how to be... fab?" Tony answered unsure.

"And it's not like we would free you... okay we would but you would totally break free yourself anyways!"

"That is... quite accurate," Loki purred. Tony send Steve a 'ha! I told you so!'-look. And Steve just pitched the bridge of his nose looking exhausted.

"Okay Tony. You win. Go get Thor," he muttered. Tony jumped up and down clapping his hands.

"Really! Gee Cap! This gonna be the best day ever!" He then ran out of the room calling out for the big thunder god. Steve just sighed again. Why couldn't he just say no?

Tony found the big viking raiding the fridge. Like REALLY raiding it. He only did it like that when he was furious.

"Thor! Me and Steve are taking the Reindeer to SHIELD so he can get a proper cell!" Thor groaned.

"Just take him! See if I care!"

"Yeah... Mind moving the hammer?"

When the three guys had disappeared down to the garage where Happy was waiting, Thor hurried to the lab and to Banner.

"My dear Bruce! I smell a dead rat! Anthony and Stephen have just left with my brother. To accommodate him in a SHIELD cell."

"But I thought we agreed on that it was safer to keep him under your hammer for now? Wow this is a little insidious."

"And I also believe Stephen is in love with the man of iron." Bruce sighed with a small smile.

"Oh the drama!"


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: Epic nightly adventures starring Loki**

****

"Okay. So if anyone asks you, Loki fucked shit up and got away... again!"

"Anything for you Mr. Stark!" Happy said with a wink. Tony have had to offer him major raise for this. But it was fine. He was way too rich anyways.

The three men got out of the car. They were in the more decadent, bohemian quarters of the city. Steve smiled in recognition. He had been hanging out there a lot in the 40's before the serum.

"I know this place," he said happily.

"I've been beat up in that alley. And that one. And behind that theatre!" Tony looked at him with a fond smile.

"No more of that after the serum, huh? It's a shame though. I bet you looked super cute back then." Steve blushed. He would say something but Loki cut him off.

"Not only cute. Beautiful like an elf-prince too," he said while winking at Tony.

"Would you like to see for yourself?" Tony's eyes were on the size of dinner plates.

"Could you do that?" he asked with a breathy voice. Loki flipped his hair with a smug grin.

"Well of course! That would be the easiest of things. Do you mind Stephen?" Steve frowned nervously.

"Will it go away again?"

"Yes. You will return back to normal when the early sunlight hits your skin."

"Come on Steeeeeve! I wanna see!" Tony pleaded with those big doe eyes pointed directly at him. That should be illegal. Steve sighed.

"Okay then... But don't get disappointed, Tony. As I recall I was pretty average looking. Nothing interesting." Loki and Tony send big toothy smiles to each other and Loki stepped forward, wavering his hands over Steve's body and the big man felt himself suddenly growing small again. It didn't hurt but it sure felt weird.

"Don't be frightened," Loki whispered and stepped back again eying his work with an appreciative smirk. Steve smiled shyly and turned to face Tony who was staring shamelessly at him with wide open eyes and a dropped jaw.

"So what do you think?" Steve asked turning around.

"MOTHER OF DICKS!" Tony roared and ran forward sweeping Steve from the ground swinging him around.

"YOU ARE JUST SO PRECIOUS! THIS REALLY IS THE BEST DAY EVER!" Steve laughed and accepted the manhandling. There were nothing he could do about it in that state anyways.

They went to a shabby but cozy bar with red silk wallpaper and candlelight, at first, were they tried bohemian Absinth. Tony apparently thought that the drink was made for Loki. They talked and laughed like they had been friends for years and Loki told them great tales about all his male encounters. And even about those few ones that Thor apparently had experienced in his wild youth which made both Steve and Tony shit bricks. He then made them die a little bit by telling them the story about how he and Thor once had to dress up as bridesmaid and bride to get Mjölnir back from the the frost giants, that had stolen it once.

Then they went to a gay club. At that point Steve's world was spinning (that absinthe was some strong stuff) and Steve felt like he was celebrating with fairies. Well fairies, guys covered in glitter. Potato, tomato? He could probably have hooked up with a good share of them but of some reason he was only dancing with Tony who was spinning him and swinging him around like the guys from his age had done with their ladies.

But Loki... Loki was really ruling the place. Tony had found the right one to teach him how to be fabulous because that word surely did describe the guy. He was at the moment doing the most unbelievable moves on a pole.

"See! i told you this was a good idea! That guy is awesome, why are we even fighting him?" Tony said. Steve laughed.

"Because he is trying to take over the world once a month? But you're right he is pretty cool." Tony spinned him around again and then dragged him into a tight embrace as the music changed to something slower. - Stephen Grant Rogers! What do you think you are doing! - the Captain America voice was yelling in the back of his head as Steve slipped his arms around Tony's waist. - Miss Pott's would cry if she saw you two like this! - Steve smiled weakly as he rested his head on Tony's chest. - Fuck everything! Tonight he is mine, so shut up cap! -

"And once again I am finding myself doing Freya's job," Loki muttered to himself as he watched the two men slowdance completely in their own world.

"Isn't that just adorable... i think I have to throw up a furball... Bwadrr!" He then turned and grabbed a scrawny guy with turkish hair by the arm.

"Come on pheasant! We will now dance!"

"Oh the moon! It is beautiful! We have to dance under it to honor it!"

"Oh that would be magical, Loki!... No Tony I am not that drunk... okay I am."

And then they could be found running into a small park where no gardener apparently had sat his foot in quite awhile. Loki ran in between some trees and Steve and Tony was following him. They were holding hands now. And then they danced in the moonlight like it was the last night on earth.

Eventually they became so exhausted that they collapsed on the ground. Loki set fire to a stone?

"I am not only the god of mischief but also the fire." And they gathered around the magic campfire. Tony's back against a three with an arm around Steve.

"Why are we enemies?" Steve asked softly. His eyelids were starting to feel heavy. Loki's face became serious for the first time in a very long time.

"It's too late for anything else," he answered.

"You know... If you stopped destroying everything, we could take you back to the tower... uh! And then you could totally become an avenger... and then..."

"And then Fury would get really mad! And he would lock not only me, but us all in a lab, but it would be totally worth it! Oh... now we have to do it!" Steve cut Tony off. Loki smiled a weak smile.

"I would like that but I am afraid that it might be my purpose in life to 'fuck shit up' as you pheasants call it."

"Why?" Steve asked.

"I just want a little respect and I can't get that in other ways. Because else they are all like: 'Oooh look at Loki, he looks like a girl muhahaha!' on Asgard or: 'Loki got pregnant again! What is it this time? A cow hohoho!' Yeah I gave birth to a horse! So what? I did it to save their arses! And then when I destroy everything they are all like: Wow dude relax! We were just kidding and then they leave me alone... Brutes. I hate Æsirs!" Steve and Tony send sympathetic glances to each other.

"They sound just like the jocks on my old high school," Tony muttered.

"Mine too," Steve added.

"But don't they respect your magic? It is pretty impressive." Loki sighed.

"It is women's magic..."

Tony woke up when the first pale sunlight shone through the treetops. He looked down and saw a blonde head resting on his chest snoring softly. Loki was gone. They must have dozed off. Steve was again back in his tall muscular form as Loki had promised. He gently ran his hand through the blonde's hair while softly calling out the his name.

"Steve... wake up. We have to get back to the tower. Maybe we can sleep a couple of hours before the other wakes up." Steve's eyes slowly fluttering open.

"Where's Loki?"

"He's gone?"

"What are we gonna tell Fury?"

"We figure something out. Come on we have to get back."

Then they walked back to the tower on the empty streets in silence.

They found to their own luck the whole tower asleep. They stopped in the hallway on the way to their rooms.

"So tonight was..." Steve couldn't even finish the sentence. Like Tony had said It really had been the best night ever! Tony didn't answer right away he looked up into the soldiers eyes. He hadn't really noticed how long his lashes were before. And how red end perfectly plump his lips were. He stepped closer and placed his hands on the blonde's shoulders. He slowly ran them down his chest and around his waist. Steve looked like he were going to say something but Tony was faster. He raised himself slightly on his toes and pressed his lips against the other man's.

For what felt like a way longer moment than it really was, Steve's world was exploding in fireworks, rainbows and kittens. His eyes widened at first but then closed as his own hands found their way around the inventors waist. Kissing Tony was the best thing he had felt in his life so far. But then suddenly the other pulled away. The big, brown orbs widened in terror over what he had just done. He backed away slowly with the lips slightly parted. Then he turned around and ran away.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6: Oh the drama

"WE'RE BREAKIN' FREE! SOARIN! FLYING! THERES NOT A STAR IN HEAVEN THAT WE CAN'T REACH! IF WE'RE TRYING! YEAH WE'RE BREAKING FREE OOOOHHHH!"

"Really? High School Musical?" Clint asked while looking at Steve. Steve sighed.

"At least he is taking what happened with a smile," he muttered.

"So what did happen?" Bruce asked almost hiding the suspect tone in his voice.

"We were taking Loki to the head quarters and of course he had to escape on the way over there. We were chasing him all night but he got away. Fury was not pleased when he found out." He was still a terrible liar but right now he was in such a bad mood that the rest of the team seemed to believe him.

He had been lucky that he had called Fury, and not told him in person because then he most likely would have had his face chewed off. Boy had he been angry. He had yelled at him for at least twenty minutes. But it wasn't really the Cyclop that was causing Steve's rather emotional state. He couldn't stop thinking about how Tony had kissed him and then runned off like that. He had looked terrified. This could only become awkward.

"Mr. Stark. You are an idiot," Tony muttered to himself. What had gotten into him? He had a girlfriend for fucks sake! And a damn hot one he had tried to hook up with for years! He loved Pepper so why did Steve's lips feel so much better? God damn it Steve! And the way he had looked just before Tony had fled. Like a kicked puppy or something. - Congratulations Tony! You are a major douce! - He grabbed his phone and dialed Peppers number in a hurry. He needed to see her pronto so she could kick some sense into him with some hot, heterosexual lovin'.

"Pepper!"

"Hey honey!" Pepper's voice cheerfully sounded through the phone.

"Yeah so you need to come over. Like now!"

"Is there anything wrong Tony?"

"No. I just need you in my bed. Now."

To Tony's big disappointment it only made the matter worse! Because the more he tried to focus on Peppers hotness while they were doing it, the more he actually pictured Steve squirming underneath him instead. Fucking bastard!

Bruce jumped as the door to the lab almost was kicked in and a very angry Tony Stark entered. He stomped forward and made himself faceplant the couch while roaring a furious, animalistic sound. Bruce straightened his glasses with a small chuckle.

"So mind telling me what's wrong?"

"What's wrong? Steve is a fucking contagious bastard's what's wrong!" Bruce laughed and walked over and dropped down on the couch next to Tony, which face was still buried in the black canvas.

"You know being gay is not contagious. That is something your favorite people from the bible belt have made up," Bruce said.

"Yeah? Then tell me why I can't make love to my girlfriend without picturing him instead?" Tony asked. Bruce was one of his best friends so he could just as well tell him.

"Oh Tony. There's nothing to be ashamed of. I think we all have done that at some point. I mean look at the guy. He could make everybody doubt their sexuality and he doesn't even know!" Tony lifted his head and looked disapproving at his friend.

"You all picture him when you have sex?" he asked with a monotone voice.

"Pigs," he added so low that Bruce almost didn't hear him. Almost. Bruce smiled strained.

"Apparently you are no better yourself... Perv. No go back to your room. I think Pepper is missing you."

_Tony walked out of the elevator. He was exhausted after a long day of saving the world. He hummed in appreciation as his nose caught the amazing smell of food. Not just any food but Steve's cooking (the not so unbearable healthy stuff)._

_ "Honey I'm hooomeee!" he called out with the deep voice of a man from an old black and white movie. _

_"I'm in the kitchen love!" the answer came from a creepily familiar voice. He hurried through the living room and into the kitchen. He dropped his briefcase on the floor as Steve turned towards him with a dashing smile. He was wearing the frilly apron... only the frilly apron._

_ "So would you like a shower first, or dinner... or me?_"

Tony woke up with a jerk.  
"You gotta be fucking kidding me," he muttered eying his raging boner. Pepper groaned and turned to face him.

"What's wrong sweetie?" she asked. Tony send her a crooked smile.

"Just a dream. And now I have something for you to take care of..." Pepper lowered her glance eying the impressive erection. She looked back up returning the not so innocent smile.

"Mr. Stark. You are making me blush!"

Steve was awoken by the deafening pleasure screams coming from Tony's room. He groaned and buried his head under a big, fluffy pillow but still it couldn't cut the noises out. Did those two never stop? Pepper had arrived later that day and since then they had been going almost nonstop. And what was worse Tony hadn't spoken a word to him all day. It was almost like he was avoiding him, which he probably also were. Steve got out of bed. There were no way he were going back to sleep now. It had hurt before the Tony being with Pepper thing, but after the kiss it was almost unbearable. Every moan from Pepper felt like a stab into his chest reminding him that Tony belonged to another. Steve swallowed the lump in his throat and ignored the burning in his eyes. He walked out the door heading for the gym. It felt like it had been million years since he last went there and now he really felt like destroying a ridiculous amount of punching bags.

Steve uttered a weird mix between a sob and a laugh when his eyes fell on the first punching bag. There were taped a face and a note onto it.

Hey pretty boy! I thought you could use some motivation down here so I have once again improved the bags. Happy pounding! Love Tony.

Steve planted a violent fist on Director Fury (or that natural size Fury-face Tony had printed out and stuck to the bag.)

"Damn it Tony," he muttered.

"Why do you have to torment me like this?"

A week went by and things didn't get better for any of them. Tonys inappropriate dreams only became worse and it even came to that point that he couldn't even look Steve in the face anymore. Pepper was with him a lot and they used most of their time fucking each other senseless. In the bed. In the workshop. In the shower. Against the wall. This of course led to a week of complete agony for Steve. They hadn't really spoken since the kissing-incident, but when they finally were in the same room Steve kept sending Tony sad, puppy eyes when he thought no one was watching. But then again stealth had never really been his thing.

Tony jumped a little when he entered the living room. The whole team except Steve was sitting there looking like they were waiting on someone. They looked a little scary.

"Sup guys? What are you doing?" he asked nonchalantly.

"Tony we need to talk," Natasha started. Tony's eyebrows flew up in surprise.

"About what?"

"About you and Steve!" Clint cut in with the bad cop voice.

"What about us?" Tony asked still confused.

"We don't know what is going on between you but it has to stop! God!"

"But there's nothing going on between us," Tony tried but was cut of by a scornful 'ha!' from Natasha. She continued in a more gentle voice.

"Look Tony. All we ask is that you talk to him. And figure this out, because you are not treating him nice! Plus all that loud fucking is clearly killing him. Couldn't you just be a little considering of the boys feelings!"

"Which feelings? He don't have any feelings!" Tony's voice was higher than usual now. Thor placed a calming hand on his shoulder.

"He is flinching like he is being whipped every time a pleasure scream is resounding from your room. But you just keep going. An going. And going. And..."

"Yeah I get the point," Tony cutted him off with acid in his voice, but Thor ignored him and kept talking.

"My dear Stephen is dying a little bit inside! It is a terrible tragedy. I don't ask you to do anything else than just talk to him. But at this I am really begging you, because I think it is the lack of you being present in his life that is hurting him the most!"

"Wait what? Dying inside?" Tony said with a screechy voice. There came a synchronical sigh from the whole team and then something hit Tony. He hadn't even thought about how Steve felt about all this. He had flirted shamelessly with him all night and even kissed him. And then he had fled (almost screaming in terror) and now he was avoiding him and constantly fucking another person really loudly apparently. How did that seem? Steve didn't know that he had fled because it had felt way too good, and he was avoiding him because he were afraid of raping him if he came to close. The worst part were that he suddenly remembered Steve had kissed him back.

"Sweet mother of Nicolas Cage!" Tony roared as he ran out of the room. He ran down the hallway and bursted into Steves room only to find it empty.

"Son of a bitch," he muttered and was about to leave again when he saw his sketch book on the bed. He reached out and flipped through it while a smile grew on his face.

"Romantic little prick... I don't look that good," he chuckled and threw the book back on the bed pages flipping over a dozen drawings of Stark himself.

He continued his frantic quest of finding Steve and ran towards the gym next. This time he was lucky. The super soldier was standing right there beating the shit out of a punching bag like he hadn't been doing anything else all week. Which he actually hadn't. Wearing a thin, slightly see through, white tank exposing every muscle on his torso, skin sleek with a thin layer of sweat, and grey sweatpants just slightly revealing just how amazing that ass were. And his arms. Oh god those arms. Tony had never thought arms could be such a turn on. Suddenly heat rushed through all of his body and one thought blocked out everything else. He needed to touch him. Now!

"So just how many of those have you ruined?" Steve jumped a little by the sound of Tony's voice. He could almost hear the smirk. He didn't sound mad but Steve was about to apologize anyways because he had indeed ruined a ridiculous amount of those bags. He didn't. Because before he managed to say a thing, he was being spinned around and silenced by Tony's lips crushing against his own in a bruising mess of stubbles, teeth and a tongue violently being forced into his mouth. He made a surprised 'Mmmm!' sound into the other's mouth as he were pushed backwards and down into the mountain of punching bags that had seen better days. Tony was on him instantly straddling his hips, pushing his t-shirt up and exposing his chest. He broke the kiss attacking his neck instead with showers of not so gentle kisses where some definitely were going to leave marks, while exploring the amazing torso with his hands.

"Tony?! What are you doing!" Steve whined face as red as a tomato.

"Shut up Steve," Tony growled biting down hard into his shoulder. Steve yelped.

"Ouch! That hurts!" Tony smirked and shifted on his lap. He could clearly feel Steve's growing erection through the sweatpants.

"But you seem to enjoy it." he stated and continued the trail of kisses down his chest. Steve's face turned to a even darker shade of crimson. He whimpered pathetic as the other gently bit his nipple. Without further warning Tony slipped his hand under his waistband and down his boxers gripping his member firmly and started pumping it. Still not gently at all. This was probably Steve's clue to use some of that super soldier strength and throw Tony through a wall or something but again he found himself completely incapable of saying that two-letter word of disagreement. The worst part was that it felt amazing. So wrong but still amazing. A way to slutty moan spilled over his lips to his own big embarrassment but Tony looked pleased and fastened the rhythm while claiming his lips once again.

Tony couldn't believe how easy it had been to turn the always neat Captain into that mewling, squirming mess under him. He was even more gorgeous in real life than he had been in any of his dreams. Pinning a much larger man down was awesome!

"Tony! I'm gonna..." Tony leaned down lickin the shell of his ear whispering 'come' sounding like his throat had been abused by sandpaper. That did it. Steve came in his hand with a sweet cry arching his back.

And then suddenly it once again hit Tony just what the fuck he was doing. And that this amazingly enough NOT had been the reason to why he was looking for the man in the first place. And that he suddenly had made this matter even more complicated. Damn it! Why did he even have such a brilliant brain when he was always thinking with his cock?!

"FUCK!" he yelled and jumped up and flew out of the gym in terror once again leaving a fuzzy looking Steve with that terrible, heartbreaking expression.

**So... yeahh... I hope you guys liked that. And I hope you like the story so far.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7: I love you, Pepper**

****

Tony ran directly to his lab and barricaded himself in there like it was the freaking zombie apocalypse. That had done it! What the fuck was he doing? He had cheated on Pepper, forced himself on Steve and then runned away... again. That had done it he was sure. The kid would really hate him for real now and he totally deserved it!

By the same time a shadow of Steve walked from the gym. Dead in the eyes, hair as a haystack and covered in hickeys. He didn't even notice the team in the living room and just walked by them with a dazed expression. He wobbled to the kitchen and downed a glass of water in one drag. Thor was the first to approach him.

"Stephen! You are a mess? Did Anthony find you?" Steve looked confused a second, first noticing someone was talking to him at that moment.

"Pardon?" Thor repeated his question.

"Tony was... yeah... he found me... but then he ran off... again. I don't know where he is now," As Steve was answering the question tears started to well up in his eyes. He didn't even register it happening before they were running down his face dripping onto the floor.

"Steve?" Bruce asked with a gentle voice. Steve lifted hesitant a hand to wipe his cheek and looked almost surprised at his own drenched hand.

"Oh boy," he muttered.

"Guys I'm sorry. I'm not really feeling that well. I think I will go to bed now." With that said he slowly turned around and trudged away disappearing into his own room .

"I don't think he fixed their problems. I think he made them worse," Bruce mumbled.

"I must declare that I have reached my limit!" Thor growlet.

"If I see him hurt my precious Steve just one more time I might plant Mjölnir in his skull. Oh my poor Stephen! He doesn't deserve this!"

Tony could hear the thunder all the way down the lab which could seem like Thor was angry. Probably at him. The thunderer and Steve was to be considered BFF's after all. Tony had been walking back and forth for at least a half hour. He had really tried to gather his thoughts but it seemed impossible. What could he do? He couldn't possibly just dump Pepper just like that. And even more important. Was he in love with Steve? What the fuck, if so!

"Okay... okay... okay! You can deal with this," he muttered. Damn he needed a drink or ten... thousand.

"No! Don't drink! You have to be sober to deal with this! Fuck fuck fuck crap fuck! Okay you can do this. You go out of the lab... and find Steve... Yes... And then you have a long talk. You apologize for assaulting him and leaving him like a little bitch because he's totally not! And then you hug and everything is rainbows and kittens and friendship." Tony was babbling now as he dangerously approached his stash of liquor.

"And then you call Pepper and you too have a long talk and she will probably cry and slap you... maybe I shouldn't tell her..." His hand was opening the cabinet now, all by itself. He was reaching out after a bottle of the strongest stuff he had in stock when he was interrupted by a strict knock on the door. Tony jumped out of shock and spilled some colorful curse words.

"Tony? Tony! Are you in there?" It was Pepper's voice and she didn't sound amused.

"Shit..." Tony whispered.

"No! No! Mr. Stark is not at home please leave a message!"

"Tony! Open the door or I will go get Thor to open it... with Mjölnir! We need to talk!" Tony felt his blood freeze in his veins. How the fuck did she know?

"Okay... I go get Thor then!"

"No wait!" Tony walked over removing the couch barricading the door and defeated let the door slide open.

"Come in then," he muttered. To his own relief Pepper didn't look like she was going to kill him. She, infact, didn't look like a woman who had been cheated on at all, but she didn't look too pleased either.

"This isn't working out, Tony!" She said as she stomped in. Tony looked like a big questionmark.

"What?"

"Us Tony! We have been going like bunnies for a week but you are still not present at all!"

"What are you talking about? I was present! I was right there in bed!"

"Yeah... But your head was someplace else! For god's sake Tony! You have been moaning his name in your sleep all week! And don't pretend like it's nothing! I have seen the way you're looking at him! And you have been doing that since you casted your eyes on his star spangled ass the first time! But this has escalated into something I can't control, and we can't have that. I'm always in control!"

"B-but..."

"YOUR GAY! Gay for Captain freaking America! And he is just as gay for you! Don't pretend you haven't noticed! Watching you two is like watching FREAKING BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN!" Tony had to wipe a little spit from his face as he pouted.

"Pepper. Don't be stupid! Of course I'm not gay. Have you any idea of how many women I have slept with? Okay... I must admit I have checked his sweet ass out at several occasions and I just might have developed a tiny crush on him, but for fucks sake haven't anyone? I mean look at him! He's just so dreamy... and sweet... and dance like an elf prince... and have the prettiest eyes and..."

"TONY! Give me your arm!" Pepper cut him off. Tony was so perplexed that he just did as he were told. So that was how it felt like? Pepper took his arm and started shaking it, and to Tony's big surprise his hand started dangling like crazy. His wrists were almost as loose as Steve's.

"Oh... my... god..." Tony whispered.

"Pepper I... I... What now?" Pepper sighed with a sad expression.

"I have to leave you... No don't look like that. This is for the better and it was not like we were going to last forever. I knew that from the start and at the moment I think this relationship is ruining us both and not to forget soldier boy up there. Let's face it. He just crazy about you, and I am scared that he will plant that shield in the back of my head if I don't back off real soon." Tony couldn't help but chuckle at that.

"He would never. You know that." Pepper smiled.

"I know. But I still want him to like me." Tony smiled but he couldn't stop just one single tear running down his cheek.

"I still love you, Pepper," he barely whispered.

"I know. But not in the girlfriend-way." She leaned forward pressing a small kiss to his cheek. Then she patted him on the shoulder.

"Now go and get your soldier boy!" She said with a wink and a smile. Tony nodded and rose to his feet and started to walk away. Halfway over to the door he changed his mind and ran back dragging the woman into a tight embrace.

"Thank you Pepper," he mumbled down her hair.

"I will always be there."

Steve was laying in his bed trying to convince himself that getting the serum injected had hurted way more than he was hurting now. Damn you Tony. Why did he always have to make things so difficult. Steve heard the door open. It was probably Thor who would comfort him. Footsteps approached and soon he felt the weight of someone else on the bed. He still didn't bother to react. Maybe he would go away if he thought Steve was asleep. He didn't like the thought of his team members seeing him like this. Then he felt the other body crawling under the blanket. And gentle lips on the bare skin between his shoulderblades. He tensed up a moment before Tony's voice was whispering gently into his ear.

"I'm sorry."

At first Steve didn't respond to Tony's approach but then the broad shoulders started to shake.

"Steve?" He only got a sob in response. - Crap fuck shit! I didn't make him cry! Oh fuck I totally made him cry! - Tony thought as he tried not to panic. He had only seen Steve spill his not so manly tears two times before and it had been horrible, but this was definitely topping everything, because this time it was entirely his fault. And it was the most horrible thing he had ever felt. Probably something alike the feeling of smashing a puppy with a baseball bat.

"Steve! Please. I've been a jerk okay, but you're just driving me crazy. I seriously feel like a mix between a schoolgirl and a dog in heat when I'm around you, and it is freaking me out. So much that I completely forgot to think about how you might feel!" Tony could hear the desperation in his own voice.

"I'm terrible. I know. It was me who gave you that incredible long speech about accepting who you are and stuff, and then I can't even accept my self. Pretty pathetic huh?" He swallowed. Steve was still not reacting. Still sobbing.

"Well I just came to tell you that. And that I might be in love with you... or something like that. I don't know. I'm not really good with all that feelings stuff." Steve suddenly shifted and turned almost violently to face Tony. He looked furious but with pathetic, red eyes and tears streaking his face.

"Tony you are probably the worst of all the people I have ever known! How dare you?! One thing is putting me through this madness, but what about Pepper? Sometimes I doubt if you even THINK!" Tony smiled a sad smile.

"Well about Pepper. We had a serious talk today. Apparently I have been moa... saying your name in my sleep all week and most likely meant that I was crushing hard on you or something. She told me a lot of things I wasn't aware of. Like that I am gay and that she couldn't control that, and that she had to leave me. And then I told her that I would always love her and we hugged and cried, but it was not messy at all, and I actually feel great about it! Like it was the right thing to do, because I clearly doesn't love her the right way and stuff and now I'm rambling but anyways, I have just had the healthiest break up in my life I think." Steve looked a little confused.

"So you're not together anymore?"

"Nope!"

"Because you're..."

"Apparently are into Super Soldiers now," Tony cut him off with an awkward grin. It took a couple of moments for Steve to let the information to sink in. Tony leaned in planting a soft kiss onto his lips before he could reply. Steve's face betrayed him and cracked into a small smile.

"So can we fuck now?" Tony asked. Dead serious.

"NO! I'm still mad at you! That before was the first time anyone had touched me like that, and you almost violated me! You're a jerk! I can't be with a man I don't trust!" Tony flinched at that.

"But Steve I thought you liked me too?"

"I have never said that!... Oh who am I kidding, I totally do! I am completely head over heals for you! This sucks!"

"But then why can't we..." Steve cut him off with a groan.

"I need to know where I have you! You have runned off two times already and I don't want that to happen again! Have you any idea how much that hur..." This time it was Tony who cut him off but with another kiss. A little longer than the last one and with him gently biting down on Steves bottom lip as he pulled away, leaving the soldier panting, face slightly flushed.

"Seriously Tony. You make me wanna kill myself sometimes," Steve muttered really trying to keep up his 'angry face'.

"What I was going to say was, I can't be in a relationship with you before I know you will take this seriously and I am not just some 'experiment'. That does also mean no sex! You got it?"

"Yeah yeah I understand. No Fondueing..." Tony muttered with a slightly grumpy voice. Steve's eyes widened.

"How did you...?"

"My father had so many good stories to tell!"

"Now I know who you have your jerk-gene from."

"Ok. I'm sorry about that. But can I atleast stay the night?" Steve sighed rubbing his eyes.

"Why?"

"Because I want to be near you," Tony answered with big, sad puppy eyes. Steve groaned irritated. Why did he always have to do that.  
"...Ok," he muttered and added a 'no touching!' as he eyed Tony's 'a little too happy face'.

"No touching." Tony repeated. Steve turned away again so he was facing the wall. It didn't take long before he felt Tony's arms wrap around him. Steve sighed inside his head. Of course he couldn't bring himself to push the other man away. And of course this had to be the best he had felt in weeks. Jerk.

**So thank you very much for the nice reviews! I'm glad that you guys find the story amusing c: New chapters will be up soon!**

**Landevejsridder**


	8. Chapter 8

**AN: Hey guys! Thanks for the very nice reviews and stuff, they were a bliss to read! To the one who didn't get the wrist-thing: apparently everyone in this story with homosexual tendencies is having slightly 'Gay-hands' (loose wrists). Basically it is just the way Tony (and Pepper) can tell when people are playing for their own team. Here is a link to a demonstration so you can get the picture ;)**

watch?v=kzfaJZe8inE

Ps. Hope you enjoy this chapter, and I repeat. Thor's love for whales is canon! Go watch Ultimate Avengers now. It is just beautiful. 

**Chapter 8: Whale-savers and whale-killers**

****

Tony was sitting on the kitchen table staring sleepily at his wrist.

"I still can't believe she had to flop it in my face before I noticed," he mumbled. Steve chuckled.

"And then she yelled you were gay? I am starting to think that this is how you do it in this age." He was stirring some unbearable healthy porridge he insisted on feeding them, wearing the frilly apron. It was early morning and no one else were awake. Steve was a morning person so he always awoke that early. This morning tangled completely with the inventors body. The perfect start on their 'not being in a relationship' - thing!

"But I don't feel any different. Shouldn't I start feeling more fabulous?" Tony asked.

"I think Loki have to teach us both now. Do you think we can get away with breaking him free again next time he's destroying everything?" Steve asked fluttering innocently with those ridiculously long eyelashes.

"I really have destroyed you, haven't I?" Tony laughed and ruffled his hair. Steve giggled in his completely unmanly way, which he didn't care about that much anymore. There was one thing Steve at least liked about this situation. Him and Tony could go back to almost being normal again... almost.

When the rest of the team got up they immediately sensed that something had happened. First things first Tony was sitting on the kitchen counter. Steve was beside him making breakfast and smiling? And more important they were talking casually. None of them commented on it but they all secretly wished that Tony would take a shower so they at least had a song that could give a hint. Under the whole meal Tony couldn't help but notice how Thor was glaring at him. He shuddered. The big æsir could be so scary sometimes. He poked Steve under the table.

"Why is Thor looking like he wants to strangle me with my own intestines?" he whispered. Steve shrugged.

"I don't know? Have you offended him or something?" Tony shrugged. He didn't really remember but then again he often didn't pay attention to what he said.

After the meal, Clint and Natasha dragged Steve away so he could spar against them, and Bruce had excused himself and immediately runned of to the lab. That left Tony with the demi god with the black aura.

"So I should probably join Bruce and go science. See you around Mc. Hammer!" He was halfway to the door when he felt a firm hand on his shoulder.

"Anthony," sounded a dangerously low voice behind him. Tony broke out in goosebumps and cold sweat.

"Yes Thor?" he answered with a slightly high pitched voice.

"What have you done to my Stephen?"

"I don't know what you are talking about?" Tony's voice was trembling now. Facial color blue.

"Last evening he came up here. Looking almost ravished and with tears in his eyes. He quickly excused himself and left to his own quarters." The grip tightened around his shoulder. - Shit that is why it was thundering! I am so not gonna survive this! -

"Look I didn't ravish him!" Thor growlet.

"Say that to my face."

"Okay maybe a little..." The grip was now bruising and he felt his feet let go of the floor. He would get thrown out of the window for sure! What was it with him getting thrown out of windows by gods anyways?!

"WAIT THOR! BE REASONABLE!" Thor didn't respond but just slowly approached the window.

"PEPPER AND I BROKE UP! I TOLD HIM THAT I WAS IN LOVE WITH HIM! AND WE SLEPT TOGETHER!" Thor growled even deeper and started to open the window. Tony facepalmed over himself and his big mouth.

"Wait we didn't... you know. We just slept! You know I can actually be a very gentle and respectful lover! His virtue is still intact!" Thor sighed and let go of his shoulder so he fell to the floor like a rag doll. Tony couldn't help but let go a sigh of relief.

"So you are courting him?"

"No. Sadly. I apparently have to deem myself worthy first. He was not really pleased by my behavior this past week." Thor nodded, still looking rather pissed.

"Good. I don't approve of your romance. You are indeed not worthy of his love!" Tony tsk'ed.

"Well thank you very much for the support!" he yelled voice dripping with the sarcasm. Thor just started walking away. He stopped up and looked at Tony (still on the floor) for the last time.

"If I catch you as much as touching him again, I won't hesitate to smash your skull." Tony just lifted his hands in surrender. But he didn't promise anything.

"So I found out why Thor is mad at me," Tony mumbled. He was laying with his head in Steve's lap watching something about elks on Animal Planet.

"Hmm?"

"Apparently he's gone all protectormode and will defend you against me with all his might. He tried to throw me out the window."

"Mmhmm. You did deserve that," Steve answered still absorbed by the show. His hands were gently running through Tony's hair.

"Thanks a lot," Tony muttered ironically.

"Hmm 'm bored. We should go mess up your image, and make Fury pissed." he added.

"How?"

"Don't know... we should do something really cool... like... REALLY cool. I wish Loki was here..." The program stopped for a commercial break. A trailer for some Whale saving show started running over the screen.

"Poor whales. I wish they would get protected better..." Steve mumbled. Suddenly Tony sat up in a quick movement. He turned to look at Steve with a giant, mischievous grin.

"What Tony?"

"We should go whale saving with Thor! Can't you see it? It would be brilliant. Fury hates when he does it, and maybe I could redeem myself in his eyes, because he kinda threatens to kill me if I touch you." Steve looked unimpressed at him.

"You won't have to worry about that. I wouldn't let you touch me even if my life depended on it. But saving whales sounds like fun." Tony didn't pay attention to the whale part. He immediately pushed Steve down on his back slowly crawling over him with the smile of a predator.

"So you wouldn't let me touch you even if your life depended on it," he repeated while letting his hand wander up Steve's inner thigh. Steve gasped as Tony tugged his head back by the hair and slowly licked up his exposed throat and all the way up under his chin. He stopped and planted a quick kiss on his cheek and then got up and tiptoed out out of the room while whistling.

"I go tell Thor about the whalething!" he exclaimed with a singsong voice. Steve sighed and looked down at his now slightly tighter pants. Smug bastard. He would pay...

"I must admit I had thought that this fight was one I had to fight alone!" Thor exclaimed with a giant, tooth smile as they entered the boat. Tony was just about to answer him but Thor quickly turned and glared at him.

"I still hate you man of iron," he growled. Steve smiled with the most angelic features that could have been seen on a human being. He reached out and gently stroked Tonys bicep.

"Me too," He spoke softly.

"Shut up, Steve."

Thor had been overjoyed when Tony had asked if Steve and him could join him on the whalesaving trip. The other activist had been a bit more mistrustful of the thought of sharing their adventures with Captain America and Ironman. But then again they were quickly accepted into the pack, when Tony threw Bruce's huge bag of weed on the table. As soon the ship left the harbor Tony started to get bored again. There were hours to the whale hunting ships would pass by and he really didn't feel like just sitting and waiting. Steve was looking like he had a good time though. He was sitting and talking with the pierced, shabby youths trying to understand their lifestyle, his eyes big with wonder. Tony had thought the big blonde would be intimidated with that kind of lifestyle, but it looked like Steve actually could identify himself with the kids with mohawks and dreadlocks. They were, when all was said and done, also fighting for freedom and justice and a better Amuricuh! The discussion was getting pretty heated and Tony decided that he better interfere before they convinced Steve to become a communist vegetarian. He got up and walked up behind Steve.

"Hey freedom boy. Let's go exploring," he whispered. Steve's face lightened up in the smile of a five year old at Christmas eve.

"That sounds AWESOME!" he answered and immediately excused himself. He had never really sailed that much and when he had done it, he had never had the time to go explore the ship. They quickly left and started their adventure.

"You know. Those things they were talking about. Much of it was pretty much communism," Tony said with a smirk. He had expected Steve to jerk up and go all a 'good communist is a dead communist'-mode, but Steve didn't really react. Tony carried on talking.

"You know... communism. The exact opposite of AMURICUH!" Steve looked at him with a blank expression.

"Wasn't that really popular in some places in Europe and Asia after I was frozen?" he asked. Still not provoked at all.

"Uhm yeah... It didn't work out that well though." Steve smiled.

"It's a shame though. It was some beautiful thought's, you know everybody helping out each other, but I can see problems with it working out in real life." Tony facepalmed.

"You really do suck at being republican."

"But I voted for Obama..."

"Yeah that's exactly why!"

"I was fighting the Naziz not the communists."

"Oh boy. I don't even need to mess up your reputation. You would be able to do that all by yourself," Tony laughed and ruffled Steve's hair. The golden boy still didn't look like he had understood what he had just said. There would be some konservatives there would be really sad if they found out.

Tony opened a random door and his face instantly lighted up like he had just found a hidden pirate-treasure.

"Sweet mother of Nicolas Cage..." he whispered with a breathy voice. The door led into a closet. A closet filled to the brim with barrel after barrel of beer.

"Say did you remember to eat your pill this morning, sweet pea?" Steve shook his head with a small laugh.

"Don't I always?" he asked. Tony smirked mischievously.

"Then let's get this party started!"

Apparently only a little alcohol (well a lot of alcohol!) were needed to make the activist's forget about ideals and a better world for a moment. Soon folk metal was booming out of a hopelessly outdated boombox and Thor was headbanging on the table with two guys with dreadlocks.

But Steve had some serious problems he never had had to worry about before. Apparently the alcohol had went straight to his cock this time. He could feel it almost yell for attention every time Tony as much as moved and right now Tony was moving... alot. The playboy was at the moment dancing his ass off. Because of the choice of music he luckily didn't squirm in those obscene moves he were usually doing. It was more like a folk dance where he was swinging the one activist around by the arm after the other. His eyes were shining with laughter and god wasn't that the sweetest thing? Steve face planted the table with a groan. - You're still mad. Very mad indeed. That man is bad company! You will only end up hurt, - he chanted inside his head, but his mind kept wandering back to their short moment on the couch. Tony really was a dick but then again, he had told Steve he was in love with him, and maybe he actually meant it after all. A heavy body dropped down beside him.

"Greetings my dearest friend," Thor breathed. His eyes were dazed and he reeked of alcohol, but he did also just down a whole beer barrel on a bong. Steve sat up and smiled at the viking.

"Hey Thor. You're having fun?"

"I swear on the all father's missing eye, I will protect thee!" Thor beamed completely unprovoked.

"And if that MAN ever lays as much as a finger on you, I will SLAUGHTER him!" Steve slowly laid a hand on Thor's arm.

"Go to bed Thor. You're drunk," he said with gentle but not much less of the 'Captain voice'.

"You are to be treated well! This is the only thing I wish for!" Thor dragged him into a crushing embrace.

"Hey wow wow! Be careful you're squishing him!" Tony was grinning from ear to ear walking towards them. He loved 'drunk Thor', even when he threatened to kill him. But suddenly he noticed something. His smile immediately faded as he rather intently stared at Thor's wrist. Steve looked worried at him.

"What's wrong Tony?" he asked softly, but Tony just shook his head.

"No... That can't be right. I must be imagining things..." Steve was about to answer but then an activist-girl with long, purple hair ran in from the deck.

"They are coming!" As it was a spell everybody got up and grabbed megaphones, signs and banners. Thor instantly became sober and rose in a dramatical motion.

"It is time," he muttered and marched out with the aura of a king. Tony and Steve snickered to each other.

"Shit just got serious," Tony whispered and grabbed Steve's hand as they followed the mighty god.

The whale hunting ship was way bigger and Steve was afraid that they would just run them over at some point. But soon Thor was standing and yelling an epic rant to the 'whale killers' on the other ship.

"I HAVE FACED THE FROST GIANTS OF JOTUNHEIM, DARK ELVES AND EVEN THE FIRE DEMON SURT HIMSELF, SO YOUR THREATS MATTER NOTHING TO ME... WHALE KILLER!"

"Whoooohooo! Tell them Thor! Down with those capitalist pigs!" Tony was nearly killing one or two bystanders with his violent sign-waves. Steve had to swallow down a chuckle.

"But Tony... I thought you were one of the capitalist pigs?" Tony playfully slapped him with the sign.

"Sssshhh Capsicle!" One of the infamous whale killers had stepped forward on the other ship and started yelling into a megaphone.

"I want be warning you again! If you don't turn around and let us pass thing will get serious!" Steve could see some of the men on the boat was carrying guns.

"Oh but things are serious," Thor stated with a dangerous, low voice.

"Even though we are but peaceful demonstrators, do not assume we can not be provoked!" He didn't even manage to finish the sentence before a shot passed by him dangerously close. Steve smiled angelic to Tony.

"I think we should inform them just who they are up against," he said sweetly. Tony nodded.

"I think you're right. Go tell them!" He gave Steve an encouraging slap on the ass which Steve replied by giving Tony a not so encouraging backhand to the face. Then they stepped forward. One on each side of the great Æsir.

"Excuse me sir? Do you have any idea of who you just shot at?" Steve asked politely (but in the Captain voice, which pretty much meant shit just got serious.) Tony snickered and couldn't help but think something along the lines of 'Dis gunn be good..."

"Get away kid or I'll shoot again!" Tony flinched with a grin. He really shouldn't have said that.

"No YOU better back off or I'll sink your goddamn boat myself, son!" Steve yelled back. Captain-mode completely engaged.

"And who are you to do such thing?" the whale killer asked with a mocking voice. And there Tony saw his chance to step on the stage.

"Who he is? WHO HE IS?! That, my friends, is Captain FUCKING America! And the big loony hippie over here you just shot at is the mighty Thor! That's right folks... HALF OF THE FUCKING AVENGERS IS ON THIS SHIP SO IF I WERE YOU I WOULD TAKE ON ANOTHER BOAT, CAUSE YOU CLEARLY DON'T WANNA FIGHT US!" To Tony's big satisfaction he could hear someone on the other ship yell 'holy fuck that's Tony Stark!', it was about time someone recognized him anyways.

"THE AVENGERS? What the fuck are you doing out here?!" Steve sighed dramatically.

"I thought that was obvious? WE'RE AVENGING THE WHALES!... Bitch." Tony pattet him on the arm.

"Nice one Steve. Nice one." he whispered still a little overwhelmed that he had just heard Captain I-never-swear using the B-word. That was why it had been a bad idea to let him watch Breaking Bad. He had really started to adapt a little too well to this new century after he had agreed on letting Tony corrupt him.

"I DON'T CARE IF YOU WERE THE FUCKING QUEEN OF ENGLAND! THIS IS OUR JOB! NOW GET OUT OF THE WAY! THIS IS MY LAST WARNING!" Tony and Steve rolled eyes to each other. Tony then cleared his throat and stepped forward while slapping his own chest yelling:

"COME AT ME BRO! I'LL FUCKING WRECK YOU!" Steve couldn't control his face muscles and cracked a smile.

"Show them your hammer," he whispered to Thor. Tony didn't really notice Thor summoning an angry thunder cloud just above them, so when the other ship started to turn around he of course thought it was his overwhelming manliness that had intimidated them.

"Yeah just as I thought. Seriously. DO YOU GUYS EVEN LIFT?!" Steve managed to see that the whale killers leaders face had turned bright red in anger, but he managed to control himself, and did not shoot at the mighty Stark even though he looked tempted. It was a beautiful sight. Tony turned around facing Steve, Thor and the activist's with hands raised in victory.

"We did it guys!" he yelled.

"We saved the whales!" The activists exploded in wild cheers. Tony locked eyes with Steve and his face cracked in a broad grin as he ran directly into Steve's arms. And Steve did something he never had thought he would do in public... ever. He swinged Tony over his arm and bent over him, kissing him passionately in real Gone with the wind style. He didn't really notice how everybodys eyes immediately locked on them and how the crowd grew silent. He broke the kiss leaving Tony panting for once, still in his arms. And first then he noticed the silence around them.

"Oh... That wasn't appropriate," he mumbled. Tony looked up at him with glassy eyes.

"Wow! Steve... you're just so... wow," he whispered. Steve really did nothing but surprise him today. Then someone started slow clapping. And another one joined in and soon the whole crowd was applauding them. Tony chuckled.

"At least they approve of our gromance."

When the whole party went back inside to celebrate their victory by lighting up Bruce's weed, Steve grabbed Tony's hand and started dragging him away in a hurry.

"Where are we going?"

"I don't know... wait... this way." Steve lead Tony towards one of the lifeboats. He started climbing inside and Tony hesitantly followed him. It went a little too slow so Steve grabbed him by the waist and lifted him inside, then he laid Tony on the floor of the boat leaning over him kissing him tenderly. The genius sighed and Steve could swear that he saw a tiny, little flush on his cheeks.

"Seriously Steve. Don't do stuff like that." Steve smiled as he laid himself on top of the other man.

"Why?"  
"It's just cruel when you don't even wanna let me touch you." Steve slowly slid his leg in between Tony's thighs making the other groan.

"That might be true, but I never said that I couldn't touch you," Steve answered just blushing a tiny bit. Inside his head Cap was yelling about lack of self control and other fun things, but Steve Rogers, the scrawny, sappy, gay-kid from Brooklyn didn't listen at all.

Tony found himself back resting against the greek-god torso, already panting and Steve hadn't even done anything to him yet. Steve's hands had wandered down his body and was now slowly working his pants open.

"Hey kid. You don't need to rush things. I can occasionally be patient." Steve chuckled softly and slipped one hand down the genius' pants.

"I want to, so shut up for just one second. By the way I'm not a kid."

Steve's touch were gentle and unexperienced but even though he was lacking at the basic techniques Tony still felt like he was on fire. Soon he was shamelessly arching his back thrusting into Steve's big but surprisingly soft hand while the one unmanly moan after the other spilled from his lips and he didn't even care. He was in the bottom of the lifeboat of a greenpeace (or something like that) ship getting a handjob of Captain fucking America, could it get any better? Soft lips were molesting his neck and another hand was in his hair gently pulling it. Tony uttered one last muffled scream of pleasure as the orgasm rolled over him leaving a sticky trail on his stomach.

"Fuck Steve..." he whispered still shivering. Steve just leaned in and kissed him softly on the lips. Tony smiled against his mouth and shifted a little in the soldiers lap. He could clearly feel something really hard poking him through the layers of cloth.

"Still not allowed to touch you?" he asked. Steve was dying to give in and just let the playboy ravish him but his stubbornness ended up winning over his bodys aching for release.

"Not yet."

The sun was slowly rising coloring the sky and the sea in amazing, warm colors. Tony was standing in the very front of the boat with his arms spread out like wings.

"Jack! I'm flying!" he squealed in a high pitched, girly voice. Steve chuckled. Natasha had once forced him to watch that movie.

"I understood that reference."


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9: We are not together!**

****

"FIRST I WAS AFRAID I WAS PETRIFIED KEPT THINKING I COULD NEVER LIVE WITHOUT YOU BY MY SIDE! BUT THEN I SPEND SO MY NIGHTS THINKING HOW YOU DID ME WRONG AND I GREW STRONG! AND I LEARNED HOW TO GET ALONG!"

"Tony is really starting to embrace his homsexuality," Natasha stated with a blank face. Steve spitted his juice out all over the morning table.

"What?! How do you...? I don't even...!"

"It's just his choice of songs lately. I mean yesterday it was It's raining men," Clint added.

"But how did you know? I thought only Thor..."

"Thor told Bruce who told me who told Tasha who already knew," Clint said with a bored voice.

"So you guys are together now?" Bruce asked with a smile. Steve went all tomato again.

"No!"

"Bullshit!" the assassins said in a synchronous voice.

"Seriously guys. We're not. Just because we both are..."

"We're totally together! He just doesn't know it yet!" Tony grinned as he entered the room. Steve blushed even more.

"Tony!"

"Oh don't worry about it honey! They don't care about me fucking you in the..."

"Tony... please."

"...ass."

"Don't make me get my shield."

"Sounds dirty. You know I love how you throw that thing. It's just so... hot."

"Geez Tony! Stop tormenting him!" Clint cut in.

They had returned from their whale-adventure a week ago and came home to a very... disappointed Fury and a media circus. Apparently some whale killer had filmed them on his phone and had put the clip on the internet, and once they sat their foot on the continent they were already all over the news and gossip magazines. Fury had yelled at them for at least an hour and called them all kinds of nice things, but Tony and Steve regretted nothing because that trip had been awesome.

Later that day Tony walked into Steves room. He didn't knock because he was Tony Stark and Tony Stark didn't have to knock on doors unless it was a really special door made of gold or something. Steve didn't really notice him as he bursted in. Tony had to strangle a giggle. His big, awe leader was dancing around with a vacuum cleaner singing along the radio that was playing Primadonna Girl on full blast. How was it even possible to be so adorable?

After they had returned from the boat trip his feelings for Steve had gotten even weirder. Sometimes when he and Steve was spending time together he would feel something. Like a fluttering inside him or something like that, and it would make him act... different. He couldn't really think on anything else than him. Sometimes he would catch himself just sitting and staring out in the air and sighing like some virgin maiden waiting for her knight. It was not productive at all. He couldn't really sleep either. When he slept alone his bed would feel cold and empty and then when Steve would let him curl up next to him his heart would start racing like it would pop out of his chest and he would again not get any sleep at all. Since when had he become a fucking high school girl? The worst part was that Steve wouldn't let him do anything to him at all, and something told Tony that this disease really needed to get fucked out.

Steve turned around only to get pushed down on his bed by a smirking Tony.

"Geez Tony! Don't do that!" Tonys hands was already fisting his hair pulling his face closer.

"Isn't it about time you just accepted that we are together?" he asked with a smooth voice as he leaned closer. Their noses nearly touching.

"Seriously... we are not. We have plenty of time to be together when you grow upmmffhhggg!" Tony didn't even wait for permission before he forced his tongue into Steve's mouth while climbing on top of him. To Tonys big satisfaction he felt Steve slowly starting to kiss back. He could feel the bigger man tremble a bit under him as he slowly caressed his neck. His lips were so soft and still insecure so Tony could easily dominate them. Tony placed a hand on Steve's chest and gently pushed him to lay down. He broke the kiss and smiled at Steves dazed expression. His hand wandered from the soldiers neck to stroke his cheek. His heart was again beating like crazy.

"I just want to fuck you so bad..." Steve made an annoyed sound and swooped Tony of him.

"...Seriously?! Sometimes I wonder if you only want to get into my pants!" Tony laughed and ruffled his hair.

"The only reason for that is that I actually like you alot freedom boy." Steve groaned pathetically and looked away not doing a very good job hiding his red cheeks.

"I just don't wanna be one of your whores," he said with a wimpy voice. Tony grabbed his chin and turned his face back so he could capture the full, pink lips once again.

"You would never be. How long does it take for it to sink through your thick skull that I want a relationship with you! Like a serious one. Can't you trust me?"

"I-I guess I can. Well not really, but I want the same thing it is just a way bigger deal for me I think. And I just need some time to learn to trust you... well it's not like I can't trust you, I would put my life in your hands on the battlefield, but this is just different you know. I just don't want to get hurt. Do you think you can wait a little longer?" He swept Tony's hand away from his inner thigh in a quick movement.

"Also with the fondueing," he then added. Tony sighed. This was starting to get really frustrating, but it was not like he had a choice. He planted quick kiss on Steves forehead.

"You're killing me. You know that? You suck." Steve cracked a small smile and leaned up to continue their makeout session. Their lips locked again only to be interrupted by the door sliding open.

"Oh! Am I interrupting something?" Pepper was casually standing in the door with a smirk on her face. Tony saw a flush slowly spread from Steves cheeks all the way down his neck. He couldn't help but chuckle.

"You actually are. What brings you here?" Pepper looked down on the calendar in her hand.

"Business stuff. We actually had an appointment, but I knew that you would forget, so I decided to pick you up myself."

"I totally forgot! I'm so sorry! I just have had so much on my mind lately."

"Yeah, I know. He's sitting right there. So you guys are together now?"

"No!" Steve cut in. He looked like he was feeling really awkward. Tony bopped him on the head.

"Don't be silly! Of course we are!" Pepper laughed.

"Well I'm happy for you, but Steve-honey. I have to steal him now. Come on Anthony. You know... work things." Steve nodded, still a little red.

"Go to work." he ordered. Tony shook his head.

"No..."

"Yes."

"Fine. But I want a goodbye kiss then."

"Geez Tony... Not appropriate..." Steve whispered nodding towards Pepper.

"You're such a prude. You didn't mind i front of the entire Greenpeace." Steve sighed and grabbed his sketchbook and lifted up so it hid their faces. He then quickly pecked Tony the lips. Tony grinned broadly and ruffled his hair he then jumped out of the bed and left the room. Pepper winked at Steve.

"Yeah... you are pretty much together," she stated just before she turned around and left with Tony. Steve scratched his skalp. They really must have had a healthy breakup since they could be so casual around each other.

A couple of hours later Tony returned looking slightly grumpy. The rest of the team had gathered around the tv watching Breaking Bad. Thor was sitting back against Steve's knees while the supersoldier was braiding his long, golden locks. This closeness weirdly enough seemed to bother Tony. It was not even an unusual sight. The two big, blonde guys were often spending quality time together like that while they spoke of their epic battles... or sensitive, feely things. Thor was actually one big softie, almost as soft as Steve. It had never bothered Tony before. Seriously what the fuck was going on?! He sent the big asgardian an evil glare before he spoke.

"Hey guys! Apparently we have to go to this charity ball this weekend!" he exclaimed. No one really reacted. They were pretty much used to attending those kinds of events. But Tony really hated them. Especially because Pepper had threatened with all from donating all his robots to community colleges to buying Steve a purity ring if he didn't behave, and Tony hated to behave.

"Cool. It has been a long time since we last went drinking together, and I think we all want to experience 'drunk Steve'." Clint said casually, not taking his eyes from the screen. Tony pointed at Steve with a stern look. Steve looked up with a questioning eyes.

"You...! You will be my arm candy."

"Arm what?"

"Arm Candy sweetie. It's the pretty girl who he is walking arm in arm and dancing with," Natasha answered with a bored voice.

"So like a date?"

"Yeah... kind of." Steve looked thoughtful but then he smiled.

"Ok. I will be your armcandything."

"Awesome! You will be the queen of the ball! My dates are always the queen of the ball..."

"Yeah... Tony... I'm still not a girl..." Steve noticed the knowing looks from the other team members and he sighed.

"Seriously guys! We're not together!"

…...

"I hate rich, old people," Tony muttered as he sipped a glass of champagne. He had promised Pepper not to get completely, uncontrollably wasted because it was abounded with paparazzis and that way it could easily get ugly, especially because the whalething hadn't really been forgotten yet. It was a shame though. He was really in the mood for some serious 'fucking shit up'.

"But you are one of the worst kind of rich people yourself," Steve answered. Tony grinned and wrapped his arm around the other's neck and ruffled his hair again (he did that alot).

"Oh Steve. You're just adorable! You should be happy that you are so ridiculously strong because else I would plant a fist in your mouth."

They had at the moment been rotting at the charity ball for what felt like an ice age, but it was still way too early to leave. Tony was on the brim of explosion. Steve had been the biggest tease all week. Or not really because he couldn't really help the way his butt was jumping when he was beating the shit out of the Fury-faced punching bags, and Tony could by the way just stop sneaking into the gym just to drool. He couldn't help the way the curves of his perfect muscles were just barely showing when he was walking around in the tight, white t-shirts he seemed to own a million of, and he wasn't even aware of how seducing his hands looked when he was sitting completely concentrated on his sketching. It was literally torture not at least to be allowed to sneak a hand into his pants.

"Yeah sure you would," Steve answered with an indulgent laugh. He looked dashing tonight in a dark blue suit and white tie. Almost like a gentleman from an old movie. It was not helping on Tony's situation. They had agreed on not being too gay because they both felt like keeping their identities as 'children of the rainbow' secret for a little while more and that was even more challenging because they had spent half of the week with their tongues in each others mouths. This situation was indeed not ideal for Tony.

At least the rest of the team seemed to have a good time. Thor and Bruce was sitting and talking with (hitting on) a couple of blonde, twin actresses with huge breasts. Those two had really become quite the bros since Tony had made Steve a party-gay. And the assassins was owning the dance floor looking almost like Cinderella and her prince.

"Aaw, look. They really do love each other," Steve said eyes on the killer-couple.

"Love is for children," Tony said with a terrible russian accent, making Steve laugh.

"It's a shame we can't act gay, else we could totally beat them at dancing... and being a cute couple. We are much cuter." Steve sighed, possibly smiling even more.

"Yeah... We're still not a couple."

"Liar liar pants on fire! Oh look at that!" Tony pointed towards the bar. Steve frowned as he eyed a familiar man with an eyepatch.

"My favorite person in the world," he replied with a dry voice. He then got up and offered Tony a hand. Tony looked questioning at him.

"Mr. Stark. How about that dance?" Tony immediately got up, grabbed Steve's hand and dragged him towards the dancefloor.

"But I thought we agreed on not acting gay?" he asked not with much care in his voice.

"To hell with that. Fury is here and I want to piss him off!" Steve answered with the angelic smile Tony had come to learn mostly meant something devilish. The smile faded away again and got replaced by a more lost look.

"Tony... I don't know how to dance like this," he whispered. Tony grinned and placed his hand on his hip.

"Don't worry sweet pea. I will lead."

Bruce padded Thor on the arm, shaking with suppressed laughter.

"Look at the rainbow warriors," he whispered. Thor turned his head towards the dancefloor. It was now dominated by the living legend and the master engineer in a drunk, clumsy but not less passionate tango. Tony was violent dragging Steve around nearly running over some old couple with fire burning in both of their eyes. The best part was that it was a walse that the band was playing. Thor laughed so it roared, after the whaletrip he had been a little more accepting of the whole romance thing. He still didn't approve though.

"The director does not look too well!" he stated pointing toward Fury who looked a bit pale.

"I don't think he know about them. It's funny though. They have been all over the gossip magazines lately. I would expect them, even Tony, to go with a low profile for a while, but they are not even trying. Look at them now... this is going on the front page for sure," Bruce said and downed what was left in his glass. Thor looked at him with a questioning look.

"Do you suspect they are doing this on purpose?"

"I don't know, Thor. Maybe? But why?" He barely managed to finish the sentence before a loud crash caught their attention. The golden not-couple was now laying tangled in each other on the floor.

"Tony! I thought you could dance?"

"Shut up! I took lessons as a kid! How do you expect me to remember?" Tony was laying on top of Steve. They had somehow gotten their legs tangled which had led to this minor accident.

"I don't even think it was the right dance."

"I am Ironman. I don't have to dance the right dance." Steve laughed.

"You're unbelievable!" Tony smiled. He liked when Steve laughed. Steve looked into his eyes with a questioning look.

"You should probably get off me."

"Fuck... I can't describe how much I want to kiss you right now." Steve's cheeks turned red again and Tony could literally feel how the blondes heart started racing.

"Then do it," Steve whispered.

"No. Then we are officially out there as a couple and you are not ready for that. You are not even ready for using that label in front of our friends."

"You're right. But I want to... let's leave."He didn't have to say that twice. Tony was instantly on his feet dragging Steve towards the exit.

Steve barely managed to close the car door before Tony was all over him. He pushed him down in the seats while kissing him like he was air for a drowning man. Steve was quickly to respond just as eagerly, gasping as Tony grinded his hips against him. Poor Happy. Steve really hoped that Tony would give him one more raise after this. This situation really sucked. He had promised himself that he would just stay on a friendly base with Tony for awhile, taking it slow and then maybe let it grow into something more when he was sure that Tony wouldn't get cold feet, and there were by the way no way he was going to give in to physical temptation just like that! He was Captain America! He had self control! That thing in the lifeboat and the hundreds of makeout sessions didn't count! - Oh who am I kidding? They totally count! I have no self control! I am Starks willing, little bitch... this sucks! - Steve thought and whimpered as Tony's teeth sank into his neck. His pants were already uncomfortably tight. It really took all his mental strength to push Tonys hand, that was now palming his crotch through the pants, away.

"Tony," he whispered desperately.

"I can't! You have to stop." But Tony just looked at him with the face of a wolf and the smile of a devil.

"No."


	10. Chapter 10

**Just a little warning. This chapter may be a bit smutty. Okay. It is pretty much just smut. And just another thing, I was supposed to write this major paper about important stuff like puppet theatre in school, which is a pretty huge deal because the grade are going on my diploma and stuff, so why the fuck am I writing this in stead?! All right never mind that... So I will just go wash my brain now... In some holywater... No it is not that bad... just regular water. Hope you guys enjoy c:**

**Landevejsridder**

**Chapter 10: White ties, bitches and shower duets**

****

  
Steve didn't really know how he ended up with his hands tied to the headboard of his bed with the white tie, but he clearly didn't like were this was going. Tony was straddling his chest slowly unbuttoning his shirt, still with that evil smirk on his face.

"Tony! Seriously! What the hell?" he whined.

"Enough is enough you fucking, little tease! I have had it! 'Oh look at me, I am Virgin America and I am saving myself for marriage!' Are you fucking kidding me?! And that would even have been okay if you just accepted we were together or at least dumped me instead of leaving me waiting growing more and more insane!" Tony looked furious now. Steve was actually a little scared of him.

"Please Tony..."

"Shut up Steve! Seriously I can see you want me just as much as I want you, so now I'm gonna take care of you... all night... and you will like it... and you can't stop me so suck on that... bitch!" He lost his patience with the shirt and ripped it open so buttons flew to all sides. Steve flinched.

"Tony please be reasonable!"

"No! I'm done with being nice! Plus if you really wanted me to stop you had already freed yourself and thrown me through a wall or something mr. ridiculously strong, so stop playing victim!" Steve gulped, cheeks flushed. As much as he hated to admit it Tony was right. The worst part was that he was actually really turned on. He stopped struggling and didn't protest any further when Tony ran a hand over his now exposed chest. Tonys expression softened and he cracked a gentler smile.

"Good boy. I knew you would eventually understand. You are just so damn stubborn." Steve sighed looking everywhere else than on Tony.

"I just don't wanna break the bed. Else I would have thrown you through the wall for sure," he muttered with a small voice. Tony snorted.

"Yeah right." His hands traveled south and started working Steve's pants open.

"Fuck. I haven't even seen you naked," he muttered. Steve closed his eyes in shame as Tony tugged both his pants and boxers down in one quick movement, releasing his raging boner. Why was he so turned on by this? It sucked!

"Wow..." Tony's voice was breathy.

"You are almost more horny than me." Steve clenched his eyes shut even tighter. He could literally feel his face burn. Tonys weight left his chest and the blue eyes fluttered open as he heard the other man leave the bed.

"Wait! You wouldn't leave me like this, would you?" Steve asked with fear in his voice. Tony chuckled.

"Don't be silly. I'm not cruel... even though it would be kind of hot... nevermind. But seriously relax I am just going to have a better look at you." Steve bit his lip and looked away. He was feeling a little uneasy about laying fully exposed like that. Even though he knew that his post serum body wasn't anything to be ashamed of, he couldn't help but feel self conscious. Tony was literally eating him with his eyes.

"Well fuck me..." he breathed.

"You are gorgeous." Steve whimpered. His cock was almost hurting now standing a little to proudly straight up in the air. Someone really needed to do something about it... now.

"Tony please..."

"I know you are a man and all that but seriously I will treat you like a freakin princess!"

"Tony..."

"I will use all the time in the world on pleasuring you until you are nearly dying..."

"Tony... shut up." Steve traitorous member was leaking precum now.

"...Oh your face when you cum..."

"TONY FOR GOD'S SAKE!"

"What?"

"I am dying here!" Tony's eyes traveled from Steves flushed face to his cock and back.

"Wow that looks painful."

"It really is!" Tony smirked and walked closer with painfully slow steps.

"And you want me to take care of it?"

"Yes." Steve's voice was strained and trembled a bit.

"But I thought you didn't like when I touched you?" Tony asked innocently.

"You suck!"

"Ask nicely."

"What?!" Tony sat down on the bed and ran a hand through Steve's blond locks.

"I said ask nicely. Else I might as well leave you like this for a couple of hours." Steve scowled at him.

"You wouldn't..."

"Oh yes I would."

"You are not seriously making me beg?"

"Oh yes I am..." Steve sighed. A strangled moan escaped his lips as Tony's hand brushed over his chest and stopped to toy with his nipple.

"Okay then... I can't believe you are making me do this... I am so gonna get you with my shield later."

"Yeah sure you will," Tony muttered and pinched the hard knop making Steve wince.

"I am waiting?" Steve sighed and turned his head away, blushing furiously.

"...pl-please do something about this..."

"About what?"

"Please take care of me..."

"And you are my bitch?" Steve's head jerked back up staring at Tony with anger flashing in his eyes.

"Seriously? You just had to go there!" Tony laughed.

"Yup! Now... are you my bitch or what?" Steve's head dropped back on the mattress in defeat.

"Yes... I am your bitch. Happy?" Tony grinned broadly and leaned down to press a quick kiss to his temple.

"Such a good boy!" Steve didn't even comment on that he just sighed again. At least everyone was still his bitches on the battlefield.

"Now I will take care of you." He pressed two fingers to Steve's lips.

"Suck them," he ordered. Steve frowned but parted his lips slightly allowing them entrance. Tony hummed and thrusted his fingers into the warm cavern and made sure they were dripping with saliva before he pulled out again. He then placed each hand on one of Steve's bend knees and forced them apart. Steve whimpered as Tony crawled in between his spread legs. He had never felt so vulnerable before.

"Wow you're even perfect down here!"

"Please don't look..." Damn it! Why did his voice sound so fragile?

"Seriously Steve, you have nothing to be ashamed of! You are beautiful!" Steve couldn't hold back a surprised whine when a sleek finger entered him without a single warning.

"Did that hurt?"

"What the hell! I didn't say you could do that!" Tony laughed and started to thrust the finger inside him a couple of times before he added another one. Steve groaned.

"Seriously! Stop!"

"Don't worry. I'm not going to fuck you tonight. Just relax and I'll make you feel really good! Does it hurt?" Steve winced a little.

"No... not really... It just feel...weird..."

"Good." Tony thrusted as deep inside the blonde as he could reach and then crooked his fingers. Steve's legs spasmed and a shout of pleasure ripped from his throat.

"What... the... hell was that?" he panted. Tony just snickered and aimed for the exact same spot deep inside him again. And again. Steve was screaming in pleasure and throwing his head from side to side.

"Aaaaah! How are you.. Ahhh... doing that! Uhhh so close!" Tony smirked and grabbed tightly around Steve's shaft.

"Not yet soldier boy," he whispered. He then lowered his head over the impressive cock swallowing as far down as could bring himself to.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh Tonyyyyy!" Steve arched his hips into Tony's mouth cumming violently. Tony gagged a little but managed to swallow the most of the load anyways. He lifted his head looking at Steve with a fond look while he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. Then his eyes widened in shock.

"...Fuck..." he whispered. Steve looked questioning at him. He was still panting.

"I totally violated you again! That is so not cool! Seriously believe me, I was really trying to be gentle and respectful lover even though you can be a pain in the ass sometimes... GOD! I haven't even taken you out on a proper date yet! No wonder you won't be my boyfriend! Thor will kill me!" Steve sighed. Well at least he wasn't running away this time.

"Tony... It's alright. That felt amazing. I seriously didn't mind. Well maybe a little at first but... wow..."

"So you're not mad?"

"No not at all."

"So we are together now?"

"Nope," Tony sighed.

"Will we ever be?" Steve smiled.

"Yes."

"When?"

"I don't know."

"You suck."

"You are allowed to touch me now."

"Fuck yes! Progress!"

"So are you going to untie me?"

"No. Not when you are such a little bitch! Seriously I thought I was the one who was afraid of commitment! You know I am going to torment you all night now!"

"I hate you."

"Shut up, you love me!"

…...

Next morning Steve woke up feeling used, sticky, sore and completely blissful. It hadn't been an empty threat when Tony had said he would torment him all night. Steve hadn't kept count on how many times the playboy had made him orgasm. Apparently he had thought it was hilarious that Steve just could keep going because of the serum. The smaller body in his arms started moving and a chocolate eyes locked on skyblue. Tony smiled sleepily.

"Hey..." he whispered.

"Hi," Steve answered.

"I feel disgusting." Tony muttered. After he had untied Steve, the soldier had insisted on returning the favor. Many times. Purely out of revenge of course. The bedsheets would probably shatter if they were dropped on the floor at the moment.

"Me too," Steve answered with a soft smile.

"Wanna shower with me?" Steve lifted an eyebrow.

"You are not planning anything creepy, are you?" Tony smirked.

"Oh you have no idea..."

Bruce was casually sitting at the morning table sipping his coffee and reading the paper. Steve and Tony was as expected on the frontpage with some beautiful pictures of them on the dancefloor. Yups... everyone indeed thought they were gay.

"It's weird. Steve should be up by now," Clint mumbled.

"I haven't seen him since the ball," Natasha muttered.

"I think he left early with Tony," Bruce said with a wink. Clint was about to say something when he was cut off by Tony's 'amazing' voice from the bathroom.

"I GOT CHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII IIIIIIIIILS THEY'RE MULTIPLYING AND I'M LOOOOOOSING CONTROO-OOOL CUZ THE POOWEER YOU'RE SUPLYING IT'S ELECTRIFYING!" Bruce smiled.

"Aah Grease today," he stated as he was interrupted by a new voice. Just slightly higher pitched than Tony's.

"YOU BETTER SHAPE UP CUZ I NEED A MAN! AND MY HEART IS SET ON YOUUUU! YOU BETTER SHAPE UU-UP YOU BETTER UNDERSTAND TO MY HEART I MUST BE TRUE!" Clint nearly choked on his coffee.

"Holy shit! I think that is Steve!"

"NOTHING LEFT NOTHING LEFT FOR ME TO DO! YOU THE ONE THAT I WANT YOU ARE THE ONE I WANT OOO OOO OOO HONEY! YOU THE ONE THAT I WANT..." Both voices resounded in a quite terrible harmony. They were at the moment yelling more than they were singing. Natasha sighed.

"Thats it... i'm done. I'm so fucking done!"


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11: Wolverine and the wolf**

****

At some point Tony had completely forgot about why Steve and him had been brought together in the first place. He faintly remembered something about pissing Fury off, and a conversation in a livingroom foggy by cannabis-smoke. Since then an appreciative look at Steve's well sculpted behind had turned into a sexual obsession and that had again turned into something completely different. Tony had accepted that he now was in love. And even though Steve still wouldn't label them as a couple, and still wouldn't go all the way with him, Tony was happy. He had completely forgot about all his worries. It felt like childhood, but a much better one that the pretty crappy one he had already had had. One with more saving the world, booze and shower duets with his childhood idol. It was awesome. But then one day Steve was gone.

Tony waited in two weeks without knowing where his freedom boy had gone. He had grown a little worried even though Fury had assured them that he was just on a super secret solo mission.

And then suddenly one day Steve walked into Tony's workshop. Tony had made a girly screech of shock because Steve looked like an incarnation of the cruelness of war and death. The bright colors of his uniform was muted by a layer of dust and mud and he looked like he hadn't slept for days. His shield fell out of his hands and hit the floor with a clank. Tony noticed that it was smeared by something that looked like dried blood. Steve looked at Tony with dazed eyes.

"He made me do it again," he whispered with a hoarse voice. Tony literally dropped what he had in his hands, even though he had used hours on screwing it together, and ran towards him wrapping him in a tight embrace. How could he have forgot about this?

Steve didn't say anymore the rest of the day. Tony washed the layers of dust and blood of his body. Luckily Steve wasn't physically hurt. He then dressed him in sweatpants and a t-shirt and led him back to bed where he wrapped his arms around him in a protective way.

"I will figure this out. A way to free you from Fury's gripp, and until then I will make you forget about this and make you feel happy. I promise you that," he whispered and kissed the top of Steve's head. Steve didn't reply, but he hugged Tony back, a little too tightly and buried his face in the crook of Tony's neck. At some point they both fell asleep.

Next morning Steve acted like nothing had happened. He got up and made breakfast for everyone. Not the unbearable healthy kind, but more like a greasy full english. The rest of the team had missed him almost as much as Tony had, and he was almost drowned in hugs. When they asked about his mission he just brushed them off by saying it was top secret stuff, but that it had sucked, and that Fury was a bitch. He really had become quite fond of that word. He then quickly changed the topic again, by asking everyone what they had been up to. No one suspected that anything was wrong.

Tony didn't know what to do. He really felt awkward about the whole feelings thing, and had always been the person to bottle things up and then abreact with the help of sex, drugs (more like booze. He had never been that into the whole drug-scene) and rock'n'roll. And now he knew that Steve probably felt horrible, and that somehow made him feel horrible too. And that he felt like doing something about it. He just didn't know what. He was great at fixing things but Steve wasn't a thing. He was a young man, barely more than a kid, who had been through a lot of unbelievable things, and was now forced to do the thing he hated the most. Killing people. How the fuck could he make him feel good about that? Tony had promised him that he would think of a solution to the whole 'owned by SHIELD'-thing, but that didn't help on that Fury already had made Steve single handedly kill off two terror cells. Tony wished that it was enough just to take Steve out, make him drink a ridiculously amount of Vodka and dance his frustrations out, but something told him that, that wouldn't go forever.

Tony reached down under the table grabbing Steves hand, lacing their fingers together. He should ask Pepper. She probably knew what to do. She was good at those kinds of things.

"So you're sure you can't tell me what the problem is?" Pepper's voice sounded over the phone.

"No its a secret. Its like... superhero problems... super problems... The point is that he is really sad and he acts like everything is fine, and he is doing a great job. I constantly forget that the problem even exist... But I want him to be happy. I don't know what to do?" Pepper didn't answer right away.

"You should probably ask him if he's okay, offer to listen to him. If you can. You are a terrible listener..."

"Fuck you too, Pepper..."

"... And then let him cry out on your shoulder if he needs to. And then don't worry too much. He's not a kid. He's strong and have probably been through worse."

"Steve?"

"Yes?"

"You know... I would totally listen if you needed to talk about it. I don't want you to go through this alone you know." Steve's face cracked in a smile. A real one. They were standing in the kitchen. Steve was washing dishes even though they had machines for that.

"Don't worry Tony. I'll be fine. I was constantly doing such things under the war. At that time it only felt like I was doing it for a reason. But seriously, I have been through worse. I mean the whole deal with being frozen and waking up to everyone being dead. At least I have you guys as a support now!" Tony's eyes widened as a realisation hit him like a brick.

At that time under Loki's first attack. That time where they had hated each other, Steve had just woken up to everyone he knew being dead. He had been completely alone in the world, and he hadn't even given it a didn't even notice the way Tony had frozen like a statue.

"But seriously! I think I might end up killing that damn cyclops one day! I really feeling like doing something really stupid in public now. Like the whale-thing, only more epic. And it is just the right time! Everyone have forgotten about the Tango-incident I think... Tony? Is there anything wrong?" Tony took a step forward and threw his hands around Steves waist, burying his face in his shoulder.

"I'm such a shitty person," he whispered.

"What? What are you saying?" Tony looked up into Steve's confused gaze.

"I love you." Steve stared at him with wide eyes and open mouth.

"Tony..." he whispered with a slightly trembling voice.

"I-I-I... what the hell?! Don't say things like that. You can't... You just can't" Steve tried to push him away. Not using his strength at all.

"Yes I can! And I do," Tony answered not moving an inch. All the insecurity in his voice was suddenly gone. A smirk even creeped over his lips.

"You don't mean that. Seriously you just broke up with Pepper. You can't already..." For every word Steve said his voice turned more whiney.

"And why did I break up with her?"

"You didn't! She broke up with you!"

"Because I was in love with you," Tony stated calmly.

"No! No your not!... I-I-I... For the love of god!" Steve turned away covering his mouth with a hand.

"Relax Freedom. You don't have to say anything back... It is not like it is a big deal or anyth..."

"IT IS A MAJOR DEAL! Seriously! If this is just something you are making up... I couldn't..." Steve could sense Tony slowly approaching him from behind.

"I am not making it up. Why is it so hard for you to believe me?" The smooth voice whispered into his ear. Steve shivered. It literally felt like his brain was exploding. It was terrifying. All he wanted to do was believe Tony for once, but he just couldn't. Tonys arms once again reached around him from behind.

"Tony please..." Lips were on his neck.

"I just don't see what you would use me for. Lately I just feel like I'm only good for killing and dancing." Tonys hand was slowly sliding up under his t-shirt caressing his abs with feather light touches.

"We both know that's a lie, and I would by the way never use you," he muttered. Steve sighed melting into the touch.

"Thank you. That's nice to know," he whispered. He bit his lip as a cold finger slowly traced his hipbone all the way down to the waistband of his sweatpants.

"I don't think we should be doing this here. Someone might walk in on us." His pleas fell for deaf ears. Tony ignored him and gently sucked down on his neck, making the other man whimper. Steve didn't fight back when Tony's hand found its way down his pants. And then the alarm went off.

"Eew guys seriously? Me and Nat at least keeps it in the bedroom," Clint said.

"At least we were not the only one's who got cockblocked by the alarm," Natasha added. They had both stomped out of their room half naked fighting to pull their shirts back over their heads. Steve's face could probably glow in the dark and he quickly untangled himself.

"Okay... you two saw nothing," he muttered.

"So apparently there's some giant wolf running loose in Brooklyn. We don't know if it is some kind of mutant or are from another world, but it is making a hell of a mess. At the moment Wolverine is fighting it alongside with some spider-kid? But he can't hold it down much longer." Fury's voice sounded over the radio in the chopper. Steve sighed.

"Okay. Giant wolf. I guess we can take care of that."

"Be careful it is a tough beast."

"Yeah sure."

"Good luck... uh yeah. You have to get it alive."  
They landed outside a big abandoned warehouse. Judging by the noises, Wolverine was at the moment fighting for his life inside.

"Okay guys! We don't know just how evil this creature is, we just know it is pretty evil!..." Steve was about to start giving orders as a bone shuddering howl resounded from the building. Thor cleared his throat. He was suddenly a bit pale.

"My dear Captain... I know that wolf. That is a dangerous creature. So insidious that it is feared even on Asgard. That, my friends, is Loki's wolf Fenris." Tony was happy that his face was covered by the faceplate. The team would probably had found the way his face lightened up by the mention of Loki, a bit suspect.

"Loki's wolf? So Loki is here too?" Steve asked. He hid his excitement well, Tony thought. But seriously. A wild night out with Loki, was just what they needed.

"I honestly don't know. And I don't know how it got here. It is supposed to be chained at Asgard! But friends! We have to be careful. That creature could be the end to any of us! It's fangs can even kill a god!"

"And Wolverine is fighting it alone..." Steve muttered.

"Hey, the spider-kid is there too," Clint added. Tony could literally see the way the cap-mode was engaged. Steve Rogers cute-factors was immediately replaced by hardcoreness.

"Okay! Thor and Tony, the three of us will run inside the warehouse and try to distract the wolf, while Clint and Natasha will shoot it with as much anesthesia as possible. Bruce will wait outside. If the wolf tries to escape, hulk out and beat the crap out of it..."

"Okay let's do this! LEEEROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOY JEEEEEENKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII IIIIIIIIINS!" To Steve's big horror he saw something red and gold fly inside the warehouse. Why did Tony never listen.

"Oh no he just didn't..."

"Yup... He went in by himself..." Clint muttered. Steve sighed. If Fenris didn't get him, the shield would.

"Okay after him! GO! GO! GO!"

The wolfe was terrifying. It was nearly on the size of a truck, eyes red and mouth dripping with froth. And Fury wanted it alive. That guy was a bitch! Steve had never seen anyone as relieved as Wolverine as they ran in and started fighting it along the side of him. He hadn't taken it on alone though. That spider-kid in a skintight red and blue suit, was swinging around shooting some web-thingie at the animal. It didn't have any effect though.

They fought in what felt like hours. Of course the anesthesia didn't work at all. The wolf tried to escape out of the warehouse, and Bruce immediately turned green and chased it down the road while roaring furiously. Steve ran after only to see the two monsters disappear.

"They are heading for the main street!" He barely managed to finish the sentence before he was picked up by a couple of red and gold arms and flying through the air in rocket speed.

"Tony! Don't do that without warning me!" Steve screamed.

"No time! They are people where they are heading! We need to evacuate them as fast as possible!"

Easier said than done. People were panicking and apparently the Fenris vs. Hulk-combo wasn't really that good. They were pretty much destroying everything. Steve was running around trying to get as many people out of the way as possible. It was pure chaos. The rest of the team caught up to them and once again joined in on the fight. The assassins was helping Steve with the evacuation, while wolverine was rodeoing the wolf. The animal was furious by now. But then again it was also being bombarded with hammers, green fists and miniature missiles. The hulk grabbed the giant wolf by it's tail and threw it into a building that slowly started collapsing.

"Nooooooooooooooooooooo my babyyyy!" A young woman in a dark fur coat and black hair in a high ponytail and dropped to her knees, while pointing at the collapsing building.

"Uh cap... I think that was a kindergarten," Clint yelled.

"Son of a gun!" Steve sprinted inside the building grabbing as many kids as possible on the way out before running in again. Hulk and Fenris was still beating the crap out of each other. Seriously did that wolf never pass out?

Steve entered the building again. Everything was dust from powdered concrete and screaming children. He had grabbed at least five kids and was fighting his way out, koffing because of all the dust in the air, when the ceiling started to creak dangerously.

"Well isn't this just my day, today?" Steve muttered as the ceiling cracked and fell towards him. He clenched his eyes shut but nothing happened.

"You're welcome!" Steve opened his eyes. The crumbling rubble had been caught by a thick spiderweb just above his head. Even though his head was covered by the red mask, Steve could still sense the smug grin covering Spidermans face.

"Thanks."

In some miraculous way they managed to get everybody out from the kindergarten only with a broken arm and a concussion here and there. The hulk had finally knocked the wolf out, and it was taken away by some agents.

Tony quickly came out out of the suit. It was a warm day of spring and the heat was killing him. Logan was sitting back against an ambulance with an ice pack pressed to his forehead. He had taken quite a hit when the wolf had thrown him of it's back. He nodded to the inventor with a grin.

"So this was... quite the fight," he mumbled with a voice raw from yelling. Tony nodded.

"You don't say. It is good you were still in New York. Say...? Tired of the x-men?" Wolverine shrugged.

"Cyclops can be a handful sometimes," he muttered. Tony sighed.

"You are not the only one. Steve and I are struggling with the cyclops of our own." At the same time Steve was walking towards them. He was tugging the mask of his face, and ran a hand through his damp locks, and then shaking his head like in some kind of shampoo commercial.

"Did that just happen in slow motion?" Logan muttered.

"He does that often."

"Leeroy Jenkins? What the hell was that about!" Steve yelled to Tony and ran towards him bopping him on the head.

"Seriously I thought that damn wolf would eat you! You suck!"

"It almost did."

"Yeah don't do that ever again!" Tony grinned.

"I can't promise anything. And what about you and the running into a collapsing building-thing? You could have been buried alive!"

"There were kids inside."

"I know, but still."

"The spider-kid saved me."

"Spiderman... It's spiderman for fucks sake." Tony and Steve turned around. The kid was standing, still masked, just behind them. Tony's face cracked in a big, grateful smile. He walked over and shaked the kids hand.

"Tony Stark, I'm a big fan! Thank you for saving my boytoy over there!" He snickered at Steve.

"Bite me!" Spiderman looked from Steve to Tony.

"So is it true? Are you guys... together?" Tony sighed.

"Well not re..."

"Yes! Yes we are!" Tony's eyes widened, but Steve send him a dashing and really contagious smile.

"Damn you Rogers."

**Hey guys! Thank you for the reviews. It really made me happy that you are enjoying the story. You guys are awesome! This chapter was a bitch to write, but I hope it turned out allright c: **

**Landevejsridder**


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12: Not that innocent **

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The popsicle was wrapped in those luscious, full lips tinting them slightly red. Tony could only imagine the chilly, cherie tasting sensation on his own and then travel south only to wrap around his already twitching cock like that. It traveled in and out of that wet cavern with a slurping sound without his boyfriend even noticing how obscene he looked.

They had decided to celebrate the slaying of the wolf by going for an ice cream in a nearby park. Tony was having a conversation with the still mysterious, masked Spiderman, but he had stopped mid sentence way too distracted by the blonde soldiers pornstar-look.

"Everyone is looking like they are in pain," Spiderman noted. Tony snapped out of his daze.

"Wait what?"

"Look around." Tony then noticed that everyone, even Wolverine, was staring at the cap... with rapefaces! Bruce looked like he were about to hulk out again, Thor had crushed his cone without even noticing the strawberry ice cream dripping over his hand, and Clint and Natasha was even filming him... on their phones. And dumbshit America wasn't even noticing!

"Fucking animals..." Tony muttered.

"It was nice talking to you, Spiderman, but I have to go protect my boys virtue. Two sec." He quickly returned to Steve's side dragging him away.

"Let's go home doll face."

"But shouldn't we debrief first?"

"Nope!"

Wolverine sighed as the two guys left.

"Kid's gonna be raped," he muttered. The assassins nodded in a synchronous movement.

"Yup!"

"Protect his virtue, my ass," Spiderman muttered looking after Tony who was dragging Steve away by the wrist.

"So my fellow warriors! I think I might leave you to spend some quality time with my Lady Jane now. I suddenly have such a craving for her warm embrace! Don't wait up for me," Thor stated calmly. He then started to swing Mjölnir without a warning and flew off the ground.

"Yeah... we should go home too and spend quality time," the assassins agreed and left too. Leaving the half naked Bruce behind with Spiderman and Wolverine.

"So you guys wanna go for a beer?" the mutant asked.

"Noo... I'm underage. I actually should hurry home. My aunt is waiting up for me, and I got homeworks," Spiderman muttered. He soon after disappeared swinging his way through the city by his web. Logan looked pending at Bruce.

"How about you, Banner?"

"I'm kind of naked... but then again. I don't wanna return to everybody doing the nasty... Screw it, I could use a beer!" Bruce said finishing with a grin.

"Hey boys... uhm you kind of saved my life back then and I couldn't help but overhearing you talking about going for a drink. Could I maybe be showing my gratitude by offering the first round?" a soft voice sounded behind the two men. It was the black haired lady with the fur coat.

"You should be more than welcome, my lady," Wolverine replied with a wink.

-#-#-#-

Steve walked out of the shower only wearing a tiny towel around his hips. He wasn't even surprised to see Tony waiting on his bed.

"Hey Tony. I thought you had things to do in the workshop?"

"Yeah I had... But then again I also have thing to do in here... If you know what I mean?" Steve sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Mind looking away while I change?" he then asked shyly. Cheeks already starting to redden. Did he never do anything but blush? He already knew the answer.

"Yes. Yes I do mind. Seriously stop the virgin act! I have seen everything before you know!"

"I hate you."

"No you don't. Now drop the towel peaches."

"But..."

"Drop the towel!" Steve sighed but then he grinned and pulled the towel of throwing it in Tony's face. He then turned around to dig out some clothes.

"Seriously. You are just so ridiculously pretty. Sometimes I wonder if you're photoshopped," Tony mumbled more to himself still with the towel on his head.

"What's that?" Steve asked and pulled out a pair of boxers from the closet.

"It's just a program used to make people look prettier on photos... noo don't get dressed!" Steve rolled his eyes.

"But seriously. When we first met I was really pissed off about it. Being so handsome and still such an annoying brat."

"You know I remember it as you being the annoying brat," Steve answered. He had dropped the boxers on the floor and was now approaching Tony.

"No no I was a douchebag. Big difference! But still... You are still pretty annoying. Oh look at me, I am super cute so everybody turns gay for me, but I am still saving myself for marriage!" he sang with a high, girly voice.

"Shut up Tony," Steve mumbled softly. He was now only inches away. Tony laughed and carried on in the girly voice.

"And secretly I am also a disney princess!" Suddenly he found himself with a lap filled with naked super soldier.

"I'm not saving myself for marriage," Steve whispered seductively into his ear. Tony's eyes grew wide.

"Oh," he smirked.

"Does that mean we can fuck now?"

"Nope!" Steve laughed.

"You're still an annoying brat," Tony muttered with a grumpy voice. Steve wrapped his arms around Tony's neck and pulled him in for a deep, slow kiss. He shifted a little. He could clearly feel something growing harder through the jeans. He smiled against Tony's lips.

"But I could take care of that," he whispered and grinded his hips against Tony's.

"Please do," Tony answered with a slightly strained voice. Steve placed himself on the floor between Tonys knees.

"You know I'm not blind. I totally noticed the way you were staring at me in the park," he muttered with a smirk, and started to work his pants open.

"So you did? You noticed the way the others were staring?"

"Mhmm. But they always do. I just chose to ignore it like always. It make it less awkward." He said with humor in his voice.

"Wait? So you know everyone is gay for you?" Steve giggled mischievously.

"I'm still not blind. But again I just choose to play innocent." If he were trying to play innocent now, he failed, Tony thought. Steve's hand had already pulled his underwear out of the way and he was now eyeing Tonys impressive boner with a smirk.

"I don't think you did a very good job on that. I mean the way you were sucking that popsicle. Not innocent! Did you do that on purpose?" Steve shrugged.

"Not at first." His hand wrapped slowly around the base of Tony's cock. Tony gulped.

"But then I saw the way you were staring, and I thought it was hilarious." He licked his lips.

"You wanted to be that popsicle, right?" he asked with the sweetest most devilish voice. Tony made a sound consisting mostly of consonants. Steve cracked a smile before he leaned closer hesitantly opening his mouth.

"You know. I will probably suck at this," he said with a laugh. Tony growled impatiently and grabbed him by the hair and pulled him closer. Steve whined.

"Yeah I'm not gonna fall for that! Oh look at me, I'm innocent... my ass - oooh holy fuck!" Steve had taken the tip of his cock into his mouth and was gently sucking it, looking up with a smirk in the eyes. He really had no idea what he was doing. He tried to remember what Tony had done those times he had been sucking him off. It actually wasn't that bad. He had imagined it to taste much worse, but it didn't really taste of that much. He bobbed his head forward trying to take more of it into his mouth but had to pull bag when he felt his gag reflex react. So he had to practise on that. Tony's hand was roughly fisting his hair, but he was not pushing him to take in more. He was probably still trying to convince Steve that he could be a gentle and respectful lover. He really tried, Steve had to give him that. Even though Steve felt like a complete noob (or whatever Clint was calling it) Tony sounded like he was enjoying himself.

"Fuck fuck fuck Steve you are killing me!... in a good way, don't stop!" Steve tried to use his tongue more, running up the underside and circling it over the head, which resulted in Tony jerking his hips into his mouth. Well he was a quick learner. He looked up at the other man through his thick eyelashes. Tony's face was flushed and he was panting and squirming in pleasure.

"Holy shit I'm close. Ah... Damn you look hot like that!" Steve chuckled inside his head. It was nice being in control for once, and seeing Tony come undone like that. Maybe he would end up enjoying this one day. He pushed his head forward swallowing as much of Tonys cock as he could handle hollowing his cheeks.

"I'm gonna... aaaaaaaah!" Something hot and thick filled Steves mouth. He jerked his head up closing his lips tightly so only a single drop escaped and rolled down his chin. He looked up at Tony with wide eyes. Tony chuckled.

"Good boys swallow," he whispered. *Gulp*

"You're not funny!"

"But why are you laughing then?" Tony grinned. Then he pulled Steve's face closer. Still by the hair. He leaned forward and licked the escaping drop of semen of his chin. Steve shuddered.

"Ew! That was your own...!" Tony laughed again.

"Stop being such a prude! Like you haven't wondered what your sperm tasted like!"

Tony crawled into the bed burying himself in the covers. Steve got up and went to pick up his underwear from the ground.

"Noooo! You're so much more fun when you are naked! Come here and join me instead!" Steve sighed, but then again. The bed looked tempting. He ended up giving in, snuggling up against Tony under the mountains of blankets and duvets. Tony smiled at him. Almost softly.

"So we are together now huh?" he asked. Steve returned the smile.

"So you love me, huh? I'm still not sure if I believe you though."

"Fuck you," Tony said with the softest most tender voice. He reached out and ran a hand through Steve's hair. He really liked doing that. Mostly because he enjoyed messing up the painfully neat parting that looked like it had been made with a ruler. He then disappeared under the covers.

"Tony? What are you doing?"

"I'm gonna suck your dick obviously!" It came from under the covers.

"You really don't have to.. aaah! Okay screw it, you have to! Mmmh!"

-#-#-#-

"We should do something tonight... Like something really cool!" Tony muttered. Steve looked up from his drawing.

"Like what?"

"Like release all the animals from a fur farm, and then blow it all up!" Tony carried on.

"Uh! And then we could bring Thor! He would love it!"

"Or I could take you out on a date?" Steve asked. Tony cracked a smile.

"Well it's not hardcore or scandalous or anything but I guess it would work out. But on one condition. I'm the one who is taking you out, not the other way around!" Steve rolled his eyes.

"Fine. Whatever makes you happy."

-#-#-#-

So they went out.  
Tony learned that night, that Steve sucked at watching horror movies. He was hiding through the most of the movie, and when he wasn't hiding he managed to let out some pretty girly screams. It was hilarious, and Tony promised himself that it wasn't the last time he forced the poor guy to watch that kind of movies with him. The best part was that it was Paranormal Activity, the lamest of all horrors!

After a nice dinner (including lot's of beer) at some indian place, they of course ended up on their club of choice. More precisely a hammered Steve dancing on the bar in real Coyote Ugly style. And he hadn't even seen that movie yet! Not innocent at all! Tony laughed for himself. If someone had told him two month ago that he would be watching his boyfriend, Captain America working his ass on a bar on the most suspicious club in the city, he would have thought that they had licked some wrong post stamps. He sighed happily. That body was really made in heaven. He was wearing a pair of tight jeans hugging his ass tightly and one of Tonys AC/DC t-shirts. It was way too small and was constantly rolling up revealing his well defined hipbones and those already fading love bites Tony had left there the day before.

"Stop staring at him like you wanna eat him, you're straight," he mumbled with a goofy smile on his face, not taking his eyes of Steve's abs.

"I'm not gay for him. He's a great dancer, that's all," Wolverine answered.

"Boo liar!" Wolverine laughed.

"I'm with my girl, stupid!" Tony lifted an eyebrow, still not taking his eyes of the blond man who was at the moment arching his back and throwing his head back like in a shampoo commercial. Did he have an aura made of rainbow glitter?

"A girl? You're seeing a girl?"

"Yup. We saved her from the wolf. Uh there she is!" Logan pointed at the bar. A beautiful, pale lady with the shiny, black hair in a high ponytail had joined Steve and was now dancing with him. With even more slutty moves. Tony nodded in awe.

"Nice one! I have no idea where you find them. I mean she's way over your league."

"I could say the same about you..."

"No way! I have been on cosmos ten hottest men list, five years in a row so shut up... bitch."

"Yeah whatever..."

-#-#-#-

"So tonight was fun!"

"Thanks to you I can't sleep alone the next three months! You suck, Tony!" Tony laughed and grabbed Steve's hand lacing their fingers together. The sun was rising, and they were at the moment walking towards the underground, so they could catch a train home before everyone awoke.

"What are you talking about, Sweetpea? That movie was not scary at all! Next time I will show you something really scary! You're gonna love it!"

"That movie would have been banned in the 40's! I think I am scarred for life, thank you very much... jerk!"

"You can just sleep in my bed the next three month then!" Steve was about to answer when he heard a pair of high heels clicking just behind them.

"WHERE IS MY BABYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!" A freezing cold force hit them in their backs, and everything went black. They collapsed on the sidewalk still with their hands laced together.

**So I'm leaving you with a cliff hanger... yeah, I suck... **


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13: Life of a poodle**

****

Tony woke up to the sound of Steve calling out his name with panic in his voice. Well it definitely was him, but something was different. He couldn't really pinpoint what.

"Tony! Tony! Please wake up!" He was really whimpering more than usual.

"Tonyyyy! You have to wake up! We are screwed!" Tony slowly opened his eyes. A shocked hiss escaped his lips. A baby blue poodle was standing over him.

"Holy shit! Steve? Where are you? What happened?" And then the poodle started talking with Steve's voice.

"We were attacked! By some witch or something! And now we are held captured... and we are... oh god... we are mini poodles!" Tony jerked up.

"Don't be silly! Of course we are not poodles!" he yelled. More like barked when he thought about it. The blue poodle rolled its eyes.

"Tony... look at me... I fit in a handbag and my fur look like blue candy floss... I eat my shield if I'm not a poodle..." Tony tried to take a calming breath. So he was pretty sure that that poodle was his beloved Captain.

"Steve... be honest with me... If you're blue... does that mean that I am...?"

"Yes Tony... You are pink." Tony heard himself break down into an agonizing howl. Well at least it was supposed to be a howl. It was actually pretty pathetic.

"Tony! Relax! We figure this out! The others will look for us!"

"Steeeeveeee! I don't wanna be a poodle... and oh mighty Thor! I AM PINK!" Steve had to strangle a laugh. He scooped closer and started comforting Tony by licking his face.

"Steve... what are you doing?"

"I don't know. It just feel right."

"Oh fuck! We are even acting like dogs! Seriously? What have we done to deserve this!" He whimpered. He looked around. They were laying in a terrible hello kitty basket in what looked like a fancy hotel suite. He could spot a lot of shopping bags laying around, and a strangely familiar fur coat was hanging over an antique looking chair in white and gold. The door to the bathroom was ajar, and he could hear a woman's soft voice singing some kind of scandinavian pop song.

"Is that the witch?" Tony asked with awe in his voice.

"I suppose," Steve answered.

"I haven't seen her yet. Do you think she is from Asgard. I mean I have heard Thor swear in the same language."

"Maybe. Oh shit. She is not to be messed with if she's from Asgard. Why do our lives suck so much, Steve? Why?"

"I thought she made you into a dog, not a pussy?"

"Oh Steve... You and your sassy mouth... Remind me again why I started liking you in the first place?" If a poodle could smirk. Steve was about to answer when the bathroom door creaked open, and a stark naked woman stepped out while drying her hair with a towel. Steve and Tony stared at each other with wide eyes. It was... her.

She was beautiful. Milky white skin, emerald eyes an ink black hair falling over her shoulders. Her body was slender with small, delicate breasts and no body hair.

"Tony! Stop looking! You're gay!" Steve whispered.

"I'm not checking her out! You don't understand! That's Wolverines lady! I knew something was wrong. She's way out of his league!"

The lady dropped the towel on the floor and headed for the closet. She made a big deal out of dressing herself first in dark green satin lingerie completed with suspenders and stockings with seams, only to pull a stylish, black sweater dress with a big turtle neck over her head. She sat down at a table and started applying makeup finishing of with a layer of ruby lipstick. She then rose again and walked over to the dog basket and crouched before them.

"Good morning boys," she said with a calm voice, that sounded strangely familiar.

"Okay! Listen lady! You turn me and my boy over there back right now, or things will get really nasty! You really don't wanna mess with the avengers!" The lady just laughed at Tony.

"I didn't understand a word you just said, sweetheart. Listen I'm sorry guys, but I have some nasty business with SHIELD, and you guys have to work as my hostages. But don't worry! I will take care of you. Just relax and try to enjoy being dogs! It will be fun!" Tony tried his best to send the lady his most evil glare. The lady laughed again.

"Oh don't be mad! Ok guys! I have a lunch date with my bff and I can't leave you alone, so if you'll just wait here a moment. I have something for you!" She turned around and started digging around in one of the shopping bags.

"What do you think she's up to?" Steve asked with worry in his voice.

"I don't know but it probably isn't nice," Tony answered.

"Ah! Here they are!" the lady exclaimed, and pulled two, terrible glitter collars studded with swarovski crystals out. Tony sighed.

"I would rather be tortured in a cave in Afghanistan," he muttered.

"Stop whining, Tony! I think they are cute!... Oh who am I kidding... they are terrible... but anyways! It's better than torture!" Steve said a little too cheerfully.

"...Shut up Steve..."

The lady clasped the terrible collars around their necks and placed them in a Louis Vuitton bag.

"Well at least our ride is fab," Steve muttered. Tony glared at him.

"Stop being optimistic when i'm PINK!" The lady laughed.

"Oh stop fighting boys! Oh by the way, try to escape and I will turn you into eggplants next time..." The last part about eggplants was growled in a terrifying and very serious voice, which gave Tony goosebumps. Okay she was indeed scary...

She walked out of the hotel room with the bag over her shoulder while humming that terrible popsong. Was it swedish?

-#-#-#-

The witch met an equally beautiful, blonde lady outside an adorable cafe. They squealed as they eyed each other and ran into each others arms while they jumped up and down like maniacs.

"Steve... please kill me... I bet you could snap my neck with your teeth. I mean even as a toy poodle you're still ridiculously buff..."

"Even if I would I couldn't. All this jumping is making me a little seasick and I'm scared i might throw up if I open my mouth too much."

"OMG! It's been so long! It's soooo good to see you!" the blonde screamed.

"I know! Way too long! Oh my! Raven, you look amazing!" the witch answered in same loud pitch. Steve suddenly looked suspicious.

"Hey Tony... I think I have seen that blonde girl somewhere..."

"I am thinking the same thing, but I can't really place her... But I have this eerie feeling..."

The girls entered the cafe, and ordered lunch while chatting cheerfully. But then suddenly the blonde started bitching about some guy...

"...I mean he's TERRIBLE! I have been by his side ALL these years, doing all the dirty work... And still he act's like I'm his freaking sidekick! And he doesn't even look at me!" She started talking with a deep voice with a terrible, german accent.

"Oh Raven you are much more beautiful in your original form... my ass! He has never even touched me when I'm blue!" The witch sighed.

"Oh Raven you know I know how that feels... but trust me girl... you are fierce when you are blue! Wear it proudly! The only reason why Magneto, that old fart, isn't interested in you that way, is because he's still head over heels over your brother. It's ridiculous, I mean he's all old, bald and in a wheelchair plus he is a good guy... Tsk... stupid old men..."

"Son of a gun! Tony... it's that blue lady from the brotherhood!" Steve whined. Tony's eyes widened.

"Mystique..." he whispered hoarsely.

"I knew I had seen her somewhere..."

"But Raven-love! Don't think about him! Enjoy your freedom. You could get anyone you wanted... hey... i have something that might cheer you up..." the witch said with a sneaky voice. Tony and Steve felt her lift the bag up on her lap.

"Come and take a look." Mystique looked over the small table and whined exited.

"Oh! They are adorable! When did you get them?" The witch grinned.

"Last night. Say hello to Ironman and Captain America!"

"Oh... those names sucks! You should have named them Doctor Doom and Venom instead! That's more edgy!" Steve pouted.

"I feel like mauling her... how dare she? Our names are awesome!" Tony growled.

"No no Raven. You don't understand! It is Captain America and Ironman!" Raven's face lighted up in a mischievous grin.

"Well fuck me!"

-#-#-#-

Raven and the witch later decided to go shopping, and Steve and Tony was against their will dragged into a billion different shops. At some point the witch looked at her watch and jerked up.

"Oh! I am supposed to meet Logan in twenty minutes! Time does fly in this realm." Raven smirked.

"Oh yeah... you were seeing him... hows that?" The witch giggled.

"He have absolutely no idea who I am, and he would be devastated if he found out. I think he actually likes me." Raven laughed out loud. The witch smirked and carried on.

"But he's a real animal in bed. He can just go on and on and on until I am almost begging him to stop... well almost..." she winked, and Raven giggled.

"And he is HUGE too! Like a HORSE!"

"And I know you have experience with that..."

"Oh shut up you mewling quim!"

"Oh boy... I really didn't need to know that," Steve mumbled. If he were a human he would definitely be crying now.

-#-#-#-

The witch met Logan at a cozy restaurant. They had ordered their meals and some red wine, when Logan eyed the Louis Vuitton bag.

"What is that?" he asked. The witch smiled.

"Oh it's just my dogs. Wanna see?" She pulled the bag up on her lap and Wolverine peeked over the table.

"You call that dogs? I call that rats rolled in candyfloss," he said with a laugh. The witch kicked him playfully under the table.

"Don't say that! You just hurt their feelings!"

"So? What do you call them?" The witch smirked.

"The blue is Captain America and the pink one is Ironman." Wolverine was literally breaking down laughing.

"Oh god! That's just perfect! It just fit so well it hurts! I think I am falling in love with you!" Both Steve and Tony frowned. He would pay for that later. The witch giggled.

"You should know. They are your colleagues after all." Logan smiled and scratched his head.

"Not really. We do occasionally team up, but we are different. I mean I'm a mutant and super hardcore... and they are more like these gay boy scouts."Tony sighed.

"I don't even feel sorry for him dating a villain now," he whispered.

"Boy scout fits well on you, but me? How dare he!" Steve chuckled.

"But we should at least try warning him." They both started yelling for Logan's attention, but it all came out as barking.

"Logan Logan! It's really us! You have to help us! You are seeing a villain!" Logan lifted an eyebrow at the small, hysterical dogs.

"I have the feeling they are trying to tell me something," he muttered. The witch smiled pleasantly and flicked both the poodles on their noses.

"They are probably just tired. Hey baby boys can you be quiet now and behave? Mommy is trying to have a nice dinner." The last thing was once again said with a terrifying voice, and Steve and Tony decided to call it a day of trying to getting saved.

Later that night Logan and the witch returned to the hotel suite. They immediately starting ripping the clothes of each other while making out furiously.

"I hate my life... Close your eyes Steve, or you get blind," Tony whimpered. Steve turned to him with a serious look (well as serious as you could look with fluffy, baby blue fur.)

"Tony! It is now we should get the hell out of here! She is way too busy to notice!"

"But eggplants?"

"Rather be an eggplant than a poodle!"

"Okay..."

Wolverine had pushed the semi naked witch up against a wall and was now digging into her crotch, making her moan loudly. Steve shivered. He really had seen too much already. When the witch untangled herself and pulled Logan into the bedroom, he saw his chance. He jumped out of the bag, she had carelessly thrown on the ground, and scurried across the floor towards the door.

"Come on Tony! We are out of here!"

"But how will you get it open?"

"She forgot to make me weak. Maybe I'm not the perfect human, but atleast I am the perfect poodle!" With that said he jumped up and grabbed the handle with his teeth. He hanged and dangled for a moment but then the door slowly creaked open.

"I take it all back I have ever said. You're not a gay boy scout!" Steve winked.

"Oh yes I am, but a damn tough one!" The ground started shaking. The witch and Logan had probably joined in their common pleasures to judge from their deafening moans and groans.

"Let's go!"

Clint Barton was walking down the street with two cups of coffee in his hands. He was exhausted. It was way too early and he almost hadn't had any sleep since they had received that cryptic phone call.

_"...I have your heroes... I will release them when you release... the wolf... you have a week... or else they might get hurt..."_

Steve and Tony hadn't returned that morning. No one had really thought about it before that call. Now everyone had been looking nonstop without finding as much as a clue. The call had been made from a phone booth so tracking the call hadn't helped them.

Suddenly he felt something small attack his leg. It was two poodles.

"Hey guys. You lost your owner?" he asked with a gentle voice. The pink poodle growled at him. Clint crouched and reached out to check the tags. He chuckled.

"So Captain America and Ironman. That fits a little too well..." He could have sworn he saw the blue one roll it's eyes.

"Hmm. That's weird... Okay let me find your owner." He reached out and picked up the pink one with one arm, when he suddenly saw something blue shine through the fluffy fur. He frowned and sat the coffee on the ground. He brushed the fur out of the way. His eyes widened.

"Guys..." he spoke into the comlink.

"What's wrong, Barton?"

"I found them... And you might wanna call in Doctor Strange..."

**So this was a fun chapter to write. **

**And I'm not going to tell who the witch is yet, but I could see that some of you already had a clue. ;) But anyways! Thanks for all the nice feedback, it is literally like fuel for my writing. I hope you will enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it. **

**Landevejsridder**


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14: Trixie the Trickster**

"WHO LET THE DOGS OUT WOOF WOOF WOOF! WHO LET THE DOGS OUT..." Clint and Nat's voices sounded from the shower. Tony sighed.

"You know we should not allow this. That is our thing," he said to Steve. Since they had returned to their human forms, they had been teased by everyone on the team and from SHIELD nonstop. Even the galaga-guy. It was not fun! Steve took it all with a smile, but then again he wasn't the pink one. He was at the moment behind Tony rubbing the tense knots out of his back.

"I mean that witch was dangerous! We could have been killed... or worse... turned into eggplants. The worst part is she took a piss all over the last piece of dignity I had left!" He heard Steve strangle a laugh.

"Oh Tony, don't take it so personal! It could have been so much worse."

"Seriously? Doesn't it bother you at all. I mean you are pretty much build of dignity?" Steve laughed dryly and started working Tony's shoulders, making him hum in pleasure.

"I don't know. I kind of gave up my dignity when I agreed on letting you corrupt me. And it wasn't that bad, I mean she didn't hurt us, and it was pretty interesting to be a dog for a day."

"Stop being optimistic. She made me pink!" Steve really couldn't strangle the laugh this time. Tony turned and glared at him. Steve just smiled sheepishly and leaned in to peck him on the cheek. Tony sighed.

"I don't know about you, but I'm not going to just let this go! I think we should have a long talk with that witch. With our fists!"

"Tony... It's not nice to hit a woman..."

"Steve... It's not nice to turn a man into a pink poodle either. Also think about Wolverine. He doesn't even know she's evil..."

"I don't think she's evil," Steve cut in.

"But you are right. We should figure out who she is and what she's up to. And what the whole nasty business with SHIELD is about." Tony nodded.

"Should we tell Logan?"

"Let's find the witch first."

"And how do we do that. Do you even have a plan?" Steve's face cracked in a broad grin. He tugged a flyer out of his pocket and handed it to Tony.

"Tony... I am the star spangled man with a plan... what do you think?" Tony quickly read the flyer. When he was done he lifted an eyebrow.

"So Trixie the Trickster, huh?"

-#-#-#-

Tony had been to a lot of parties. Some was boring, some was wild, some was illegal and some was ridiculously fancy, but when the double door to the big basement under the industrial building opened he was breathless. This was definitely over the top. A crowd of girls and some boys dressed in sparkling clothes and fairy wings was dancing like it was the last night on earth. The music was deafening and sounded like something not from this earth and the lights was shining in bright, laser like colors. He then noted a stage with a golden stripperpole. A pole that SHE was working expertly wearing something green and sparkling that didn't really cover her body.

"There she is..." Tony growled and started stomping towards her, with Steve in his heels.

"I'm going to rip her apart!"

"I don't think that kind of violence is the right approach, Tony."

"Shut up, Steve!"

The witch didn't notice them before Tony was stuffing 20 dollars into her green glitter thong, with a death glare. But then things started to get interesting. Instead of looking shocked or scared the witchs face lit up into a bright smile, that didn't even look insidious at all. Steve answered the smile with a hesitant, awkward one. And then he looked at Tony with eyes about to fall out of his head. The witch wrapped her legs around the pole and swung around it without using her hands, her smooth back arched in a beautiful bow. When she was facing them again (this time upside down), she talked.

"Hey boys!" she purred.

"I'm so happy that you found me."

"Yeah... you shouldn't be! We have a great deal of unfinished business with you, lady! Poodles? Seriously?! What the fuck!" The witch grinned and placed her hands on the floor and released her legs from the pole, swinging up so she was standing on her hands. After a moment she flipped around in the air landing gracefully on Tony's lap. The audience broke out in wild cheers.

"Ooh so you didn't like being a dog?"

"For fucks sake! You made me pink you psyko lady! And you attacked us with our back turned! That's unsporting!" Steve nodded in agreement.

"Yes very unsporting!"

"So not cool!" The witch laughed and made a big deal out of lifting her hand and stroking Tony's cheek.

"So what are you boys gonna do about it? Cry?" Tony removed her hand in a firm movement.

"We actually thought more about beating you up..." The witch sighed.

"Oh you wouldn't beat up a girl would you?"

"Oh yes we would!" Steve raised an awkward finger.

"Well I wouldn't... unless it was a villain... and I guess you're kinda villainish... I mean..." Tony rolled his eyes.

"You're not helping, Spangles. Try being a little more badass. Couldn't you... you know... engage the cap-mode?"

"It doesn't really work that way. I can't force it..."

"Great... You were more intimidating as a blue poodle..."

"I'm sorry..."

"Hey boys? Maybe we should... take this discussion someplace more private?" the witch whispered. Tony got up in a violent movement almost throwing the witch off him.

"I'm on that!" he exclaimed. The witch nodded and led them through the dance floor, behind the bar and into a store room away from curious glances. Tony smirked as the door closed behind them and started cracking his knuckles in a threatening way.

"So should we get this over with?" he asked with a rough voice. Steve sighed.

"Tony... I really don't think this is a good idea..." Steve started.

"Guys..."

"Shut up Steve. She deserves an ass whooping," Tony answered a bit irritated.

"Hey guys? Guys! It's me..."

"It's not that. It's just. You are not wearing your suit, and if she's a witch from asgard or something, then she might be a bit dangerous. And if you are starting the fight I am not going to come and save you when she is beating you to pieces."

"Are you doubting my strenght, you cheeky little prick?" Tony yelled.

"GUYS!"

"WHAT?" Steve and Tony answered in one annoyed voice. The synchronically turned towards the witch. Or what had been the witch just a second ago.

"I am trying to reveal my secret identity, you useless pheasants!" Loki exclaimed while making dramatic arm movements.

"LOKI!" The excited screams that fell from all of the three men in the storeroom were not manly. Even less manly was the way they all jumped up and down while flapping their hands like tiny tiny wings. They ended up in a warm and tight group hug.

"Oh Loki! We have missed you so much!" Steve said while crushing the pale man wearing nothing but glitter lingerie.

"But seriously! Poodles? What the fuck!" Tony said. He really tried to sound mad, but failed a bit.

"Well... I had to. I wanted my wolf back! Well I still want my wolf back." Loki said and shrugged. He walked over and found a pair of black, tight fitting jeans he pulled over the thong.

"And then you escaped. I suppose I should turn you into eggplants now," he said and winked at them.

"You wouldn't dare..." Tony said. Not completely succeeding in hiding the fear in his voice. Loki grinned like a devil.

"Don't tempt me..."

"Don't worry Tony... Loki won't hurt us," Steve said softly while patting Tony on the head. The inventor was not amused.

"So I suppose that you two are together now?" Loki asked with a smirk.

"Yeah we are," Steve answered and smiled fondly at Tony, that still looked grumpy as fuck.

"Uhuh... A shame..." Tony lifted an eyebrow.

"Why?"

"Stephen is quite handsome..." Loki purred and reached out to stroke Steve's arm.

"Don't touch him Rudolph."

"Anthony. Don't be such a mewling quim. You're pretty too. I wouldn't mind having your both in my bed." Steve flushed all the way up to the roots of his hair. Tony sighed.

"Look... Look what you have done! Now his all embarrassed!"

"Or hot and bothered..." Loki added.

"Okay guys? Shouldn't we go out and grab a drink instead!" Steve said in a high pitched voice.

"Great idea my sweet! Let's consume some beverage!" Steve squeaked like a guinea pig as Loki's hand wandered down his lower back anddown the curve of his ass.

"Loookiiiii!" Tony growled warningly.

"Oh! Forgive me!" Loki exclaimed and grabbed Tony's ass with his other hand and started pushing them out of the room.

"This was not what I meeeeaaaant!"

"Oh Anthony! Stop whining! We both know that you enjoy it you lewd manwhore!" Loki pushed the two men up to the bar and shouted for thirty shots to the bartender and the alcohol started pouring like waterfalls. It wasn't long time before Steve and Tony was shuffling violently on the dancefloor. Steve wearing a tiara and Tony in pink, fairy wings. Loki soon forced himself between them, looking rather smug with a plate of star shaped cookies with violet frosting and silver sprinkles.

"Guys guys guys! I baked! You have to give them a try!" he exclaimed with an excited voice. Tony lifted an eyebrow.

"No way! I am positive you have done something creepy to the..."

"Oh god Loki! They are amazing! I didn't know you could bake!" Steve cut him off with a mouth full a creepy cookies.

"God damn it, Steve!"

Tony ended up eating a cookie as well. They actually ended up finishing the whole plate, when Loki had left them to perform another striptease in the form of Trixie. When he returned Steve and Tony... wasn't really themselve.

"Steve... I feel... funny. We really shouldn't have ate those cookies."

"I feel... really good. Are they...like... real fairies? Are you... a real fairy?" Tony's blood was pumping and he felt happy and light, everything was fuzzy and soft and warm and Steve even more so! He felt like he could dance the whole night long or something a lot more dirty the whole night instead. All the colours was so beautiful and it felt like he could touch and taste them. He wrapped himself around Tony with a happy sigh.

"Mmmh Tony. You are so sweet even when you are a douche," he muttered and rubbed his cheek against Tony's like a giant cat. He then lowered his voice.

"I want you to..." He bit his lip.

"...take care of me... tonight." Tony shuddered.

"Oh fuck Steve!...Okay... then let's go home... now!"

"How do we... like... get home?" Steve asked. His eyes was glassy.

"I... I don't remember..." Tony answered. He actually couldn't recall how they got there. Maybe with the underground. Steve liked using public transportation of some reason and that he found really cute. He found everything about that man really cute. Maybe he could fly them home? Those fairy wings he was wearing looked realistic enough to be real.

"All father's missing eye! You did NOT eat them all!" Loki sighed. He was still in his female form, and covered by a loose bathrobe.

"One is enough for mere mortals like you! I can't leave you by yourself now. You really make my life difficult you stupid eggplants!"

"Wow wow wow!" Tony slurred.

"You didn't tell us that this was 'special' cookies..."

"Oh... do you seriously want me to believe that you thought I, the god of mischief, would offer you pastries I hadn't messed with?" Tony sighed.

"No... I guess not." Loki smiled strained.

"And it has only just started kicking in. It keeps getting worse. You are up for quite the night." Steve giggled into the crook of Tony's neck.

"Okay... What was in them?" Tony asked. He really tried to clear his head as much as possible but it felt like he was wandering around inside a giant, pink cloud. Not like anything he had tried before, and he had tried EVERYTHING!

"Oh it's just something I made out of some Asgardian flowers. It is supposed to make you feel happy, carefree and slightly aroused... But with THAT amount you guys have consumed..." Oh Tony was more than a little aroused. And Steve too. He could clearly feel it against his leg.

"Yeah I get the point. God damn it Loki!"

"Whaat... Mischief okay?! What did you think? Okay I will take you home now."

"Aaaw you wanna take us home?... that's like... so sweet!" Steve said in a ridiculously happy voice.

"Yeah you are coming home with me. There's no way I am going near that tower. Okay. I will get dressed. Stay here and don't move!" Loki was barely stomped away, before Steve pushed Tony into a wall thrusting his tongue into his mouth almost violently. Not very Steve-like and NOT innocent at all. Tony blamed the cookies. Steve had consumed the most of them, too naive to understand that Loki was most likely trying to drug them. Tony groaned as Steve pushed his knee between his legs creating that unbearable good friction, that just got even more unbearable with the weird gypsy magic flower drug in his blood that was making him ten times more sensitive.

"Steveeeee! Get off me! You are way too high!" Tony complained. He was really fighting the urge just to dry hump the shit out of him right here in the middle of the club.

"But Tony! I want toooo!" Steve whined and leaned in to bite his earlobe. Tony shivered. It was too late now. The fuzzy feeling was slowly taking over his mind.

"Say it again," Steve said softly.

"Say what?"

"That you... you know..."

"You know...?" Steve leaned even closer so his face was almost buried in Tony's shoulder.

"Love me." came the muffled reply. Tony smiled warmly and stroked the blondes head.

"You know I do." Steve made a happy sound.

When Loki returned fully dressed in his male form, he found the two heroes on the floor. Tony with his bag against the wall and Steve straddling his lap, both trying to suck the others face off. He groaned irritated but still couldn't help but grin.

"I thought I asked you to stay still?"

"You can't tell me what to do! You're not my mom!" Tony slurred.

"Thank god I'm not!" Loki muttered and dragged Steve on his feet by the collar.

"Ok! Come on Anthony! We are leaving." Tony muttered something incomprehensible and got on his feet.

Soon Tony and Steve was sitting safely in the back of a taxi driving towards Loki's hotel. Tony was still feeling like he was on fire. He really doubted he would remember anything the next day, and Steve would definitely not remember anything! But when the big blonde leaned in and whispered that something into his ear, he still got a bit shocked.

"I want you both."

**And then it all got very interesting... O_O Thanks for the feedback btw! And yes! As many of you had already guessed the lady was Loki :3 **


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15: The eiffel tower part 1**

"I'm sorry boys. You have to sleep in my bed. Wait I'm not sorry." Loki snickered as he walked into the suite. Even though he hadn't planned that the heroes would eat all of his cookies, he couldn't deny he found it amusing.

He had been mostly on earth since his first capturing. It was so easy to hide in the form of Trixie and he got a more than decent salary out of taking off his clothes on stage. He had by a coincident met Raven in a SHIELD cell, and they had bonded over their original blue skin and ability to change appearance. Then they had had a grand time escaping and once again wrecking Shields headquarters. Shortly after their ways had parted, they ran into each other again. They decided to grab a cup of coffee together and soon discovered that they also had a mutual love for fabulous things. And boys. And then a deep friendship was born.

Loki dropped his coat on the floor. He saw that Steve and Tony was standing with their heads together whispering about something.

"Hey boys? What are you whispering about?" Loki asked. The heroes started giggling sheepishly.

"Nothing..." they answered with a synchronical voice. Loki could literally smell the lie. They were definitely whispering about something!

"Okay... you are scaring me now." He walked over and sat on the bed. The two men send each other knowing eyes. The tripped over and sat on each of Loki's sides.

"You look tense," Steve said still with that suspicious aura.

"Would you like a backrub?" Loki didn't even answer before the blonde was behind him doing miracles to his shoulders.

"Well this is kind of nice," Loki said and leaned back into the touch. Tony started giggling again. Loki decided that he wouldn't ever drug them again. They became way too creepy. The brunette reached out and started running his fingers through Loki's hair.

"Oh god. It's... like... so soft and smooth... which balsam do you like... use?" Loki frowned. If this night could get any weirder...

"...L'oreal... because I'm worth it," he answered with a dry voice. Both men cracked up in thundering laughter.

"Okay... relax boys. It wasn't that funn..."

"We want to fuck you," Tony cut him off. Steve nodded approvingly, he didn't even blush. Loki's eyes widened.

"Well this was... unexpected. But then again... I can't really blame you. I am indeed incredibly hot." Loki started to caress both mens thighs.

"Now just relax and let me spoil you," he purred. Steve and Tony looked at each other. The their faces cracked in insidious smiles. In matching movements they turned and pushed Loki down on his back. Loki lifted an eyebrow.

"Oh... so this is how we play?" He didn't get an answer. Both men was kissing and licking his neck from both sides. Loki couldn't help but sigh pleased and close his eyes. Then he felt chilly hands under his t-shirt running up his sides as another pair of hands started to carefully tug the fabric over his head. Even though Tony was careful, the drug had made him clumsy and Loki's head did get stuck in the neckline. Both of the heroes started to giggle again. Loki sighed. This time of annoyance. He quickly finished the job of removing his shirt and send despairing glances to both of the doped men. The laughter stopped. They were staring at his torso with big eyes. Not those lustful gazes he was used to, but more like they were looking at some kind of rare animal.

"Boys?"

"Mm?"

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Wow!... you are just like... really pretty," Steve answered softly. Loki chuckled. He quickly got rid of his pants so he was only wearing black boxers and got back on the bed.

"Thank you very much. You guys are not ugly yourself." He looked from the one hero to the other and grinned.

"Strip," he commanded. The two men was quickly to obey. They were not graceful, but when they both were shirtless, Loki smiled pleased. Those two were a sight for the gods. He crawled towards Steve and placed a hand on his chest and gently pushed him down on the back. He leaned down and placed a light kiss on his shoulder. And then he bit down on the exact same spot. Hard. He felt the bigger man squirm a bit in discomfort under him. Not really fighting him either.

"Ah... ouch." Loki released him and eyed the impressive hickey he had left. It was gigantic. Tony looked over his shoulder and nodded in awe.

"Wow... that's brutal..." he muttered. Loki smirked and turned around. He attacked the other man the same way, and left an even bigger mark. He then pushed him down beside Steve.

"Now everyone can see that you are my whores," Loki said smugly. He was then grabbed and pulled in between the two. He surrendered and didn't complain about the manhandling.

Hands were everywhere on his body and he quickly found it difficult to gather his thoughts. Tony was lazily tracing his spine all the way down to the waistband of his boxers. On the other side Steve was licking his way down his chest. Loki was at the moment starting to grow impatient. His crotch was already practically screaming for attention. He made a pleased sound as he felt the soldiers hand lightly brush over his erection on the outside of his boxers but it was not enough. And he knew that the blonde also knew that, even in this state. He growled and grabbed hard unto the light hair and started to push his head down.

"Now show me if that mouth feel as good as it looks, mortal," he whispered. Blue eyes looked up on him through long lashes and white teeth bit down on the plump lower lip.

"Trust me. It does," Tony's voice sounded from behind him. Loki smirked. In a quick tuck the boxers was removed, and Loki's straining erection sprang free, standing proudly.

"Show him," the inventor whispered to the soldier. Steve hesitantly parted his lips and leaned closer slowly taking the tip into the mouth and then the rest of the length. He bobbed his head all the way down until he almost gagged and had to pull back with a disappointed look. He didn't try to take it that far down again, but started instead to experiment with more use of his tongue.  
Loki moaned loudly. Steve was clearly not that experienced, but it was obvious that he enjoyed sucking cocks a little too much, which made up for the lack of technique.

"Oh yes..." he hissed and couldn't help but thrust into that heavenly mouth. Steve choked a little but didn't stop. It was like that rough treatment only made him more eager. Loki did barely register some weight leaving the bed for a short moment and then returning. A bottle of something was opened and soon a sleek finger was entering him without much of a warning.

"Wait... Don't..." he forgot what to say. The blonde was at the moment circling his tongue over the tip of his cock, which was a bit distracting. His pleas was ignored and soon another finger was stretching him. Another loud moan left his mouth.

"You sound like a porn star..."

"Shut up Stark! It is your mate who works his mouth like a porn star... ouch!" Steve had 'accidentally' got him with his teeth. Tony chuckled.

"So you you... like... wanna cum?"

"No... I can go like this all day, thank you." The brunette smirked and curled his finger inside him instantly hitting his prostate. Loki cried out and came into the mouth of the blonde, that swallowed every drop.

"Booh... Liar!"

"Not a word more or you will spend the rest of your life as my pink lapdog! I liked you better that way." That statement only made the stoned heroes giggle again.

"No you don't! You think we are way nicer when we can talk and stuff," Steve said and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. Loki was about to answer him when he was interrupted by another finger sliding into him.

"What the hell, Stark?!"

"We are not finished at all." The dark haired man answered in a matter-of-fact voice. Loki was about to make a snarky comment, but then he felt hands in his hair. Apparently Captain America thought it would be appropriate to start braiding his hair right about now. Loki sighed, but didn't question it. He had reacted the same way the first time him and Thor had tried out the flower powder in their youth. Loki felt himself starting to grow hard again as the fingers thrusting rhythm increased in speed.

"I am more than ready. Stop wasting my time and fuck me already!" he groaned.

"He talk too much," Tony muttered to Steve over his head.

"Definitely. Way too much! And really bossy too."

"I know something that could shut him up..." Tony purred. Steve looked a bit lost.

"Like what?" Loki rolled his eyes dramatically and crawled a bit forward so he was partially laying on the blondes lap, and started unzipping his pants with his teeth.

"Neat," Steve mumbled.

"Please teach me... like how to do that someday."

"Yeah please do, also if we have forgot this conversation tomorrow!" Tony said. Loki didn't answer.

Steve made an embarrassing, whimpering sound as Loki took him in his mouth. The god smirked for himself. The nickname silvertongue didn't do him justice. His tongue was if anything made out of gold and gemstones and had a Louis Vuitton print. He started bobbing his head up and down. In contrast to the sweet (not that) innocent captain, he hadn't felt his gag reflex in ages and was able to take the pretty impressive dick all the way down his throat. The big blond was a trembling and twitching mess completely at his mercy, and he really took pleasure in that. He would totally use it against them next time they met on the battlefield. But then he felt something bigger starting to force it's way inside him. He had been way too caught up with Steve so he hadn't even noticed Tony removing his fingers and was now entering him. Loki moaned around the cock in his mouth as he felt the all too familiar feeling of being filled. Soon Tony was buried balls deep into him.

"Hey Rudolph? You good?" Loki sighed and turned his head with a half smile. At was nice that he worried about his well being at least (his Asgardian lovers never really did), but he had done this with so many that it barely stung anymore.

"I am very good. Please carry on." Steve ran a hand through his hair. Loki assumed it was filled with braids now.

"Does it hurt?" he asked softly. Loki snorted.

"The first couple of times will feel like being torn lengthwise. Then you will start feeling pleasure. It doesn't hurt me anymore." He groaned as he was shaken forward by the first thrust. Steve caught him and steadied him. Loki send him a grateful smile. Earthlings really was much more caring lovers. Even Wolverine who was a real animal on the sheets was way more caring than the asgardians he had bedded.

Steve's eyes was dark of lust, so Loki bended his head and swallowed him all the way down once again, trying not to bite him every time Tony thrusted inside him. It was a difficult task. Especially when Tony suddenly burst out:

"Holy shit! We are practically doing the Eiffel Tower! Hurry up and high five me!" The worst part was that Steve was all too quickly to obey. But then he once again felt that spot inside him being hit, and he couldn't really bring himself to care. His moan was muffled by Steve's manhood, but Tony still heard it and started screwing him even harder. He reached down and started stroking himself quickly and soon the orgasm was rolling over his body once again. He didn't even know how the hopeless heroes far out on asgardian party drugs, had made him cum two times already. How the hell did that even work? He could feel Tony's thrusts become more erratic. He was close. The heroes started lifting their hands once again. Loki pulled his head back and send both men the most evil glance he could manage.

"If you highfive ONE more time I swear I WILL turn you into eggplants and cook you!" No answer. Instead of high fiving the heroes had pulled each other into a warm embrace while crushing their lips together.  
"Oh isn't that just sweet? Human romance... I think I might throw up a hairball..." He grabbed Steve's cock and gave him that final stroke that brought him over the edge, with a whimper into Tony's mouth. It was only a couple more thrusts before Tony followed him, cumming violently inside Loki. All three men crashed down on the bed with a collective sigh.

"So that could have been worse..." Loki mumbled. He was again completely ignored. Both men had fallen asleep.

"Aaaw I wanted a cuddle... fuck you guys..." He mock-whined, then he summoned a cigarette which he lit with a snap of his fingers.

-#-#-#-

Tony woke up in a heavenly bed. That didn't help on the fact that he felt even worse than that time he woke up with a car battery in his chest. His head was pounding and his eyelashes felt like they had been glued together, his mouth tasted like he had been eating sand all evening and his body was more or less numb. He forced his eyes open and looked into the angelike face of Steve Rogers. He was of some odd reason wearing a tiara. What had they been doing last night? He remembered that they went to beat up the witch, but then the rest of the evening was a dark blur. He lifted an arm and started poking Steve with a weak finger. Blue eyes fluttered open.

"T-tony? What happened?" he asked with a hoarse voice.

"I have no fucking idea. I don't remember shit and now I am feeling like shit? What did we drink last night... and more important... why are you wearing a tiara?" Steve slowly felt the tattered disney princess thing on his head, before he took it off with wonder in his eyes.

"Why …am I wearing a tiara...?" He then looked at Tony and started laughing. Still with a pathetic voice.

"What?"

"You are wearing fairy wings!" Something moved between them under the covers and some messed up black curls appeared.

"...aammmyhair...!" Tony and Steve looked at each other with big eyes.

"... why is their a dude in our bed?" Tony asked. The dude ran a hand through his hair and revealed a pale, a little too well known face.

"Oh my hair is destroyed. I hate my life," Loki muttered with a frown.

"...Loki?" Steve asked with a small voice. Loki suddenly realised that he had two guests in his bed and as he remembered the happenings of last night an evil smirk spread on his face.

"Good morning boys. Slept well?" he asked cheerfully and stretched his arms to show off his body to the two hungover heroes. Steve blushed and averted his eyes.

"What are you doing here... and why are you naked? Why are WE naked?" Tony asked with a little bit of panic in his voice.

"You don't remember? Last night you went to the club I work at with the goal to beat me up for turning you into poodles..."

"Wait YOU were the witch?!" Tony yelled.

"When you found out it was me, we had a couple of drinks instead. You ate plate of 'special cookies' i made, and we returned here to have a lovely night in passion," Loki carried on and finished with a grin, as all color of the heroes faces disappeared.

"A lovely night in... what?" Steve asked with a small voice. Loki laughed out loud now, and jumped stark naked out of the bed and limped to the bathroom.

"I don't complain! I had a nice time!" he yelled from the bathroom. Tony facepalmed.

"I can't believe it," he groaned.

"What happened?" Steve asked again.

"He drugged us... and took advantage of us in a sexual way... Fuck my life! Why does this ALWAYS happen? I kill him if he have just been near your ass! Fucking rapist god!"

"To judge from that limp, I think we were the rapists Tony... I hope he's okay..." Tony stared at Steve with a blank face.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" he deadpanned. He then kicked the blonde out of the bed.

"Tony... no..."

"Oh yes! I have to inspect the damage! Get up!" Steve did as told. Tony got out of the bed and started walking around him in circles with a major frown on his face.

"I really don't think he has done anything. It doesn't really hurt... back there... you know," Steve muttered with a tiny flush.

"It better not!"

"Relax! His virtue is intact, it is you who should be worried, Stark!" Loki's voice sounded from the bathroom.

"Fuck you Reindeergames!" Tony then screeched as he eyed Steve's neck.

"Oh my god! You have a hickey on the size of freaking AFRICA!" Steve rolled his eyes.

"Well at least we are matching," he whispered.

"WHAT?!"

"You have a pretty big one too," Steve answered. Tony made a terrible almost griefing sound.

"NO! Not my skin! My BEAUTIFUL skin! I will fucking wreck you, Loki!"

"I am scared you already did," came the dry answer from the bathroom. Steve couldn't really help but chuckle. He was way too hungover to even care about anything. He stretched with a yawn and started walking towards the bathroom.

"Where are you going?" Tony asked. Still with a little bit of that screeching sound in his voice.

"I'm taking a shower. Wanna join?"

"Yes... Today we will be singing the funeral march..." Steve just laughed. His boyfriend could be such a drama queen.

**Hey guys. Sorry for the long wait. I got the flu and was literally dying for weeks, but I'm healthy again now. And my beta have been punking me for weeks about this chapter, so I hope she's happy.**

**Anyways enjoy!**


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16: The eiffel tower part 2

The hallway on the third floor in the classy hotel on Manhattan resounded by some Barbershop version of an extremely cheesy 80's hit, sung by three male voices. A maid walked by with a cart filled with towels, and a lifted eyebrow. The voices came no doubt from room 237, where that black haired woman who had stayed at the hotel for weeks now, lived. She sure must have had a wild night out. The maid had heard a lot of violent sexnoices from that particular room, but three guys was a little over the top, but she gave good tips so the maid didn't ask questions.

"WHEN IT'S COLD OUTSIIIIIIDE AND WE ARE HERE IN BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!" A voice sang with a little bit of Brooklyn accent, but the kind she had heard in old black and white movies. Another voice took over. This one sounded definitely familiar.

"LOOOOOOOOK OUT TO THE NIIIIIGHT THERE WILL BEEEEE NOOOOO SHAAAAAAME!"

"Ermagerd is that like... Tony Stark?" the maid thought. Then a third voice cut in. This one lighter with a weird, norwegian-ish accent.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALWAYS I'M GONNA BE WITH YOU, AND MAKE BELIEVE WITH YOU AND LIVE IN HARMONY HARMONY OH LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE!"

The maid carried on walking.

Inside room 237 Captain America an Ironman was really feeling the groove. They were both standing and singing (more like yelling) into some organic shampoo bottles in the bathtub. Loki, the god of mischief, burdened with glorious purpose and all that shit, was standing in front of the mirror straightening his hair with a pink straightening iron.

"I knew his hair was too straight to be true," Tony whispered to Steve. He was once again in a good mood, and had even stopped calling Loki a dirty rapist.

"Shut it Stark!" Loki muttered but kept tormenting his own hair.

"I think your curls are adorable," Steve muttered and started rubbing shampoo into his own hair.

"I am not 'adorable', I am classy, which is a skill you two by the way will never master!" Loki exclaimed with a smug smile.

"Because the gold horns of destiny is like sooo chanel," Tony whispered.

"Shut up you whore or I am going to pimpslap you out the window... again..." Steve sighed.

"So what happened last night anyways," Tony asked.

"I mean like... you didn't... do anything disgusting to Stevie-boy? Because then I will kill you mofo!" Loki started chuckling with a dark expression.

"I promise you that I didn't deflower him..." Steve was at that moment the same color of a tomato.

"Guys...? Can't you discuss that when... I'm not here?" He was ignored.

"You have to be more precise," Tony muttered. His aura was turning dark.

"Oh sweetheart, I don't think so!" Loki answered with a singsong voice.

"What did you do?!" Loki was now going all evil genius.

"Oh I'll never tell you nyehehehehe!" Tony sighed and glanced almost depressed at the pretty red guy beside him.

"What a douche..."

-#-#-#-

When Steve and Tony returned to the house, they had a scary surprise waiting for them. She was tall, red haired and very angry.

"Oh hi miss Potts!" Steve greeted cheerfully. The retard hadn't even noticed how mad she looked. He could indeed not read women... at all...

"Steve... shut up... she looks like she is going to explode...!" Tony whispered with a frightened look in his eyes.

"Wha... why?" Steve answered. Tony looked around in the livingroom. Clint, Natasha and Bruce was sitting cramped on one of the couches reading a magazine while giggling maniacally.

"Mr. Stark... you have really gone over the line this time..." Pepper growled.

"Seriously what have I done?" Pepper didn't answer the question but carried on with her monologue.

"I'm fine with the thousands of women you have dated, the three leaked sextapes and that time you puked on Madonna, but seriously?! Did you HAVE to drag HIM down with you?!" She pointed wildly at Steve.

"HE'S A NATIONAL ICON FOR GODS SAKE? And you do WHAT?! YOU DRAG HIM OUT INTO SOME ILLEGAL STRIPCLUB AND DRYHUMP THE SHIT OUT OF HIM IN FRONT OF ALL THE PAPARAZZIS! WHAT THE HELL'S WRONG WITH YOU?" Tony and Steve gasped.

"...Guys? What are you reading?" Steve asked their giggling friends with a high pitched voice. Bruce made a strained face as he got up and handed Steve the magazine. Steve saw the front page, screamed like a girl and dropped it on the floor. Tony bit his lip and bended down to pick it up. He looked through it with a cool expression.

"Well this all seems... horrible... I don't even remember this happening. It's shame though, it looked like we had the time of our life's..." he muttered. Steve just uttered some whiny sound. Tony patted him on the back.

"Don't worry about it pumpkin, at least we can assume that we have succeeded at ruining your good reputation for good."

"But Tony! To be honest I think we took it too far this time!" Steve screeched. He was literally looking like his head was about to explode.

"No no! People were expecting this. It is like all the Disney channel kids! They all end up like that too, and then they get much more famous. Don't worry! There's no such thing as bad publicity!" Steve grabbed the magazine out of Tony's hand and flipped through it. His facial color turning from red to blue. It was filled with pictures. First of him and Tony and Loki (luckily in his female form) poledancing. Then of him and Tony dryhumping on the dancefloor, which wasn't a pretty sight, and then again one of him and Tony making out furiously against a wall.

"In our defence, that paparazzi must have been a Ninja! We didn't even notice him and I always do... oh wait..." Steve pointed hysterical at a picture where Tony was flipping the photographer the bird with a smirk, while Steve apparently was licking his ear shell.

"Oh my... you really is the life of the party when you are drunk. Why have we never seen you drunk?" Bruce laughed and ruffled Steve's hair.

"Sh-shut up!" Tony shrugged.

"Well at least they don't know about the magical gypsy cookies. They only know about our gromance. We can work with that you know." Pepper punched his shoulder so hard that it definitely would leave a mark.

"For fucks sake Pepper! What the fuck?!"

"WE COULD HAVE WORKED WITH THAT? YOU COULD HAVE COME OUT IN OPERA OR ON ELLEN LIKE ADULTS, BUT NONONO! YOU HAD TO GO OUT IN FAIRY WINGS ACTING LIKE HORNY TEENAGERS IN PUBLIC! THIS IS NOT CUTE, AND NOT APPEALING FOR THE PURE CAPTAIN OF VIRTUES FANBASE!" Pepper was cut of by her own voice failing her, and she broke down coughing like crazy.

"So guys? What with the wings and tiara?" Clint smirked.

"Don't even mention that, birdbrain!" Tony muttered while he rubbed the bridge of his nose. Suddenly Steve grabbed Tony by the collar and looked desperately into his eyes.

"FURY!" Tony sighed and looked down on the floor.

"Yeah we probably have to leave the country..."

-#-#-#-

"This is why we shouldn't hang out with villains," Tony muttered as the car speeded through the city streets towards the airport. Steve whimpered and nodded.

"So how do you feel about Belarus. I think it's like near Russia or something. We could build a house in the woods and hunt bears with our bare hands the rest of our life?" Steve didn't answer right away. He was looking out the window where a blonde and a black haired woman was walking with a dozen shopping bags.

"Say? Isn't that our faghags of destiny?" Tony asked. Steve nodded.

"I don't think Loki counts as a faghag but okay?" Tony suddenly lighted up in a mischievous grin.

"What?" Steve asked.

"Screw Belarus! I have a much better idea!"

-#-#-#-

Raven and Loki was walking down the street chatting cheerfully. By chatting Loki was of course giving Raven all the dirty details of the night events. Suddenly a red Alfa Romeo drove by them with one Tony Stark hanging out the window.

"GET IN LOSERS! WE ARE GOING SHOPPING!" Then another blonde head popped up behind him.

"IN PARIS!" Raven lifted an eyebrow.

"Say...? Isn't that the good guys?" Loki slapped her with a shopping bag.

"Screw that! We are going to Paris!" Then they flapped their hands like tiny tiny wings while screaming like maniacs and ran to the car.

-#-#-#-

"So the bald, scary eyepatch-guy is going to kill you because you slept with Loki?" Raven asked while she sipped her chai. They were sitting on a sidewalk cafe in Montmartre. Raven had already earned the title of faghag.

"No no! He don't know about that luckily..." Steve laughed.

"But I might have... pole danced in front of a paparazzi... a little... wearing a tiara..." he then added with a flushed face.

"Aw honey! He shouldn't condemn you for that! I bet you were rocking that pole!" Raven exclaimed.

"Oh trust me, they were both!" Loki added with a smirk.

"Yeah... we still don't remember anything... fucking cookies," Tony muttered. He then downed the rest of his espresso and broke into a broad grin.

"So girls! Should we get on with... breaking the the city?"

-#-#-#-

At the end of the day they had been all around the city. They had been to Louvre, where Steve had been the only one that had been interested in the art. The rest of the gang had been running around, taking pictures of Loki and Tony high fiving statues in the name of America (because that what was american tourist did). They had been to Notre Dame where Loki had made every Madonna statue cry blood which made everybody freak out, and they had been around forcing Steve down in overpriced clothing against his will, while they stared judgingly at him through their sunglasses. When the sun went down, they ate weird food at a, once again, overpriced restaurant. And then they ended up getting wasted. Again. Loki had taken off with a curly haired, blonde beach-boy named Lestat, ("They are so going to fondue, Tony!" "Yeah Steve. You should probably take a break with the beer, for now...") and only minutes after, Raven blacked out. It was getting late anyways.

-#-#-#-

The rising sun colored the sky over Paris' roofs pink. Steve and Tony was sitting out on the balcony of their hotel suite. The alcohol fog was slowly clearing out of their heads.

"Yeah Fury can suck my cock..."

"Tony! Language!" Tony grinned and wrapped his arm around Steve's shoulder and pulled him in for a kiss on the cheek.

"I love you..." he muttered. Steve smiled softly, and opened his mouth to answer, but was cut of by the sounds of Raven that was violently barfing.

"Oh Raven-honey! Should I hold you hair?!" Steve yelled and ran back into the room.

**Hey guys!** **Sorry for the long wait. Have been busy fucking around in Venice looking at medival art and NOT highfiving statues. Anyways enjoy!**


End file.
